If you are at all familiar with the story of Dorothy and the Wizard of Oz you know that among Dorothy's fellow travelers along the yellow brick road to find the great and powerful Wizard was the Lion. The Lion wanted the Wizard to give him courage as he was afraid of nearly everything he faced in his life. Here he was the king of beasts yet he cowered and hid from any ever so slightly perceived threat to his survival. The Lion believed that if he had the gift of courage he would be able to step into his role as the almighty king and ruler of the forest, respected by all.
"If I were King of the Forest my regal robes would be satin, not cotton, not chintz. I'd command each thing, be it fish or fowl. I'd click my heels and the trees would kneel and the mountains bow and the bulls cow-tow and the sparrow would take wing. If I were king, each rabbit would show respect to me, the chipmunks genuflect to me. If I were King, just King." - The Lion in Frank Baum's "Wizard of Oz"
The Lion's self-worth and esteem was entirely wrapped up in and identified with a forceful title that would deliver respect.
The Lion believes that force commands subjugation. Force, to the lion, means the ability to threaten and prevail through physical strength and determination. Such commitment comes from having the courage to stand centered in the truth of who you are. The lion is scared to show up in his life powerfully as King of the Forest. And even as king he does not feel or act like much of a king because he lacks inner courage. When he does try to exhibit courage he resorts to threats and physical harm to others. Force is an act spawned out of fear, not power. Real power is a presence, a state of mind, that can only come from an authentic presence.
"Put 'em up, put 'em up! I'll fight ya' both together if you want. I'll fight ya' with one paw tied behind my back. I'll fight ya' standin' on one foot. I'll fight ya' with my eyes closed." - The Lion in Frank Baum's "Wizard of Oz"
Those a brave words that came from the lion who would run away with his tail between his legs if someone actually took him up on his threat. As we continue to observe the Lion throughout the story, we realize that the only thing that scares the lion is himself, an event of his own doing. He lives in fear. He Finds Excuses And Reasons (F.E.A.R.), blames others for his shortcomings, and believes the world, the forest and everything in it, is out to get him; do him harm.
"Ow!" - the Lion
"What happened?" - the Scarecrow
"Somebody pulled my tail!" - the Lion
"You did it yourself!" - the Scarecrow
"Oh....." the Lion
- "The Wizard of Oz"
The lion does not believe he is brave or forceful enough to be a king and, therefore, must get his courage from someone else - the Wizard of Oz. People who live with "I'm not good/smart/brave/talented/rich/pretty/whatever enough" will often become shop-a-holics hoping that the next Prada bag or Ferrari purchase will give them the self-esteem they lack. After the momentary adrenaline rush after the purchase, these people quickly seek yet another status purchase to try, yet again, to feel better about themselves. There isn't a handbag or luxury car in the world that can give anyone the self-worth they lack within. Purchasing luxury items because you enjoy them is one thing. Acquiring things because you seek your identity through them is quite another experience. Shop-a-holics with low self-esteem do not enjoy or even use many of their purchases.
When the Lion finally gets an audience with the marvelous Wizard of Oz he finds out that the Wizard isn't really a wizard after all. What this simple man tells the lion is that he's always had courage within him. All he had to do is acknowledge and honor that which is his birthright. No external thing can give a person what they believe they lack within them. What you yearn for is who you are, what longs to come forth from within you. That's why you feel 'less than' when you are not expressing your full potential; who you came into the world to be, do and have.
You already have, within you, everything you need to be do and have what you want in life. All you have to do is tap into the Wizard Within, the voice of your truth and intuition. This internal resource of wisdom and personal guidance is your birthright. As your Muse, it will always guide you safely and effortlessly as you turn your dreams, your desires, into real experiences.
"You are under the unfortunate delusion that simply because you run away from danger you have no courage. You're confusing courage with wisdom." - The Wizard in "The Wizard of Oz", Frank Baum
Valery is an Artist Mindset Mentor & Coach who helps creative people get out of their own way so that they can overcome the struggles in the life of an actor, artist and performer. Clients learn how to tap into their inner wisdom to get out of their own Inner Critic way & stop self-sabotaging behavior. Empower the Wizard Within , inspire your Inner Muse. http://www.InnerWizard.com Get Free "Empower the Wizard Within tips"!
Showing posts with label self-doubt. Show all posts
Showing posts with label self-doubt. Show all posts
Tuesday, September 15, 2009
Thursday, September 10, 2009
How Actress Courteney Cox Empowers the Wizard Within
Hardly a day goes by when I don't read or hear of some celebrity or politician publicly humiliating themselves in an unconscious act of self-sabotage. Some get up, brush themselves off, learn a few life lessons and go on to reach even higher levels of achievement. Others take a few steps back towards recovery only to rush head first into the desperate wall of self destruction again and again. It is disheartening to see someone who takes the dream that they've passionately pursued for so long and slam it hard against the wall.
Therefore, I was delighted to read the article by Kate Aurthur in last Sunday's Los Angeles Times newspaper about Courteney Cox "Courteney Cox: 'Cougar Town's' Really Normal Hollywood Star". Courteney enjoys a happy home life with her husband and daughter and actively surrounds herself with friends and activities in and outside of her work that enrich her life experience. That is the Courteney Cox of today. In the article, Courteney describes an earlier life filled with self-doubt and frustration over the fact that someone else hadn't trusted her enough to hire her for a role that would make her a success. I encourage you to find the article online and read the full text.
"I don't know how I thought all of these things were going to happen without really going for stuff. I don't know whether I didn't think I deserved it or whether I was just shy. I'm not sure." - Courteney Cox
Courteney realized that sitting, hoping and waiting for someone else to create her success for her only served to place her life experience in the hands of someone else. She discovered that in order to achieve the life of her dreams she would not only have to star in that role, she would have to mindfully write the script and direct the action. Not willing to live her life as such a victim, Courteney would have to be responsible for her life experience, stand centered and confident in the truth of who she is and what she wants in order to create the magical life she is enjoying now.
"You can live a very normal life if you don't actually look for things." - Courteney Cox
Courteney has also learned that where focus goes experience flows. She directs her attention on what she wants to bring forth, whether it be on the many homes she renovates and redecorates to the challenging roles and projects she and her husband create with their production company. Instead of regularly scanning the tabloids for gossip about herself and others she knows in the entertainment industry, Courtney devotes her time to what ignites her passion and inspires her Muse. This constant flow of positive energy has given her much of the serenity and peace that is not lost on those who know her.
"She is the most down-to-earth real human being - probably in Hollywood." - Marta Kaufffman, "Friends co-creator on Courteney Cox
Courteney continues to shape her life and expand her career with grace. Once a rebellious teen, Courtney now uses that energy to lend her support for numerous charities including "Stamp Out Violence Against Women in the Congo" and to her friends in their time of need. Sheryl Crow credits having a good friend like Courteney Cox as a force that helped her get through her recent battle with breast cancer. With her new show, "Cougar Town" premiering later this month Courtney flows knowing that she has the personal internal power to create the roles she wants to portray and the life story that is the fullest expression of her potential. I, like many, are looking forward to the next chapter.
"Now I'm much more confident. And I believe that things are exactly the way they are supposed to be." - Courteney Cox
Valery is an Artist Mindset Mentor & Coach who helps creative people get out of their own way so that they can overcome the struggles in the life of an actor, artist and performer. Clients learn how to express their full potential to get out of their own way & stop self-sabotaging behavior. Empower the Wizard Within , inspire your Inner Muse. http://www.InnerWizard.com Get Free "Empower the Wizard Within tips"!
Therefore, I was delighted to read the article by Kate Aurthur in last Sunday's Los Angeles Times newspaper about Courteney Cox "Courteney Cox: 'Cougar Town's' Really Normal Hollywood Star". Courteney enjoys a happy home life with her husband and daughter and actively surrounds herself with friends and activities in and outside of her work that enrich her life experience. That is the Courteney Cox of today. In the article, Courteney describes an earlier life filled with self-doubt and frustration over the fact that someone else hadn't trusted her enough to hire her for a role that would make her a success. I encourage you to find the article online and read the full text.
"I don't know how I thought all of these things were going to happen without really going for stuff. I don't know whether I didn't think I deserved it or whether I was just shy. I'm not sure." - Courteney Cox
Courteney realized that sitting, hoping and waiting for someone else to create her success for her only served to place her life experience in the hands of someone else. She discovered that in order to achieve the life of her dreams she would not only have to star in that role, she would have to mindfully write the script and direct the action. Not willing to live her life as such a victim, Courteney would have to be responsible for her life experience, stand centered and confident in the truth of who she is and what she wants in order to create the magical life she is enjoying now.
"You can live a very normal life if you don't actually look for things." - Courteney Cox
Courteney has also learned that where focus goes experience flows. She directs her attention on what she wants to bring forth, whether it be on the many homes she renovates and redecorates to the challenging roles and projects she and her husband create with their production company. Instead of regularly scanning the tabloids for gossip about herself and others she knows in the entertainment industry, Courtney devotes her time to what ignites her passion and inspires her Muse. This constant flow of positive energy has given her much of the serenity and peace that is not lost on those who know her.
"She is the most down-to-earth real human being - probably in Hollywood." - Marta Kaufffman, "Friends co-creator on Courteney Cox
Courteney continues to shape her life and expand her career with grace. Once a rebellious teen, Courtney now uses that energy to lend her support for numerous charities including "Stamp Out Violence Against Women in the Congo" and to her friends in their time of need. Sheryl Crow credits having a good friend like Courteney Cox as a force that helped her get through her recent battle with breast cancer. With her new show, "Cougar Town" premiering later this month Courtney flows knowing that she has the personal internal power to create the roles she wants to portray and the life story that is the fullest expression of her potential. I, like many, are looking forward to the next chapter.
"Now I'm much more confident. And I believe that things are exactly the way they are supposed to be." - Courteney Cox
Valery is an Artist Mindset Mentor & Coach who helps creative people get out of their own way so that they can overcome the struggles in the life of an actor, artist and performer. Clients learn how to express their full potential to get out of their own way & stop self-sabotaging behavior. Empower the Wizard Within , inspire your Inner Muse. http://www.InnerWizard.com Get Free "Empower the Wizard Within tips"!
Monday, May 11, 2009
Are Power-sites Sucking Your Life Energy?
“The only way to predict the future is to have power to shape the future.” - Eric Hoffer
You have the power to shape your future the way you want it to unfold. You are a magnificent and magically powerful being. You are blessed with the gift to create all that you desire to experience in this life. You live in a world rich in abundance that is yours to enjoy and to contribute your unique expression. You were given this power to enable you to assert your full potential.
When you doubt your power, you give power to your doubt. This doubt clings to you as a parasite sucking the life energy and creative force right out of you. The more doubts you have about your own ability and opportunity the more "power-sites" drain you of your power to magically create the experiences you want. You are left depleted, unable to create more than the mundane or unfulfilling experience over and over again. This pattern of creating more and more of what is not wanted only feeds the powersites. Powersites are insatiable and will consume all the power you allow them to have from the life force that is your gift and your birthright. When you give up this power to your Inner Critic, your self-doubt and fear, your Inner Critic will shape your future to mirror all that you doubt and fear.
“If you realized how powerful your thoughts are, you would never think a negative thought.” - Peace Pilgrim
Peace Pilgrim was an elderly woman who walked more that 25,000 miles on a personal pilgrimage for peace from 1953 to 1981. I cannot say whether this remarkable woman ever had a negative thought. What I can say is that every person I talk to about their life challenges has had their fair share of negative thoughts. The recent surge of self-help popularity has produced a sea of people who flog themselves if they notice a single negative thought running through their heads. "Uh-oh" they lament, "I'm having a negative thought so I must still be broken! I'm not fixed yet!"
First of all, no one is broken. No one needs to be fixed. Negative thoughts of self-doubt are natural and serve a purpose. They are indicators of whether you are moving toward or away from that which you desire. Negative thoughts are just your Inner Critic’s way of telling you that you're about to stretch and grow into a newer and bigger comfort zone and it is scared of new, unknown, places. Even if you don't particularly like the current comfort zone it's what you know and, therefore, safe.
The distinction is whether or not you give power to that negative thought by following its lead. If you do, that thought, that belief will cling onto until you consider it an integral part of your being. You will forget that this negative piece of you is a parasite rather than a birthright. With this power, the parasite will feast upon your bounty of magical gifts of inspiration, intuition, validation and self-esteem.
“He who controls others may be powerful, but he who has mastered himself is mightier still” - Lao Tzu
The next time you bathe in a negative thought process just notice it as it washes over you. Recognize it for what it is, the voice of that scared little Inner Critic who means well but is woefully misguided. Instead of giving these negative thoughts power by acting upon its lead (even if that action is a decision not to act), choose to act from a deeper place of inner power and strength. This deeper place within is the home of your wisdom, inspiration, intuition, personal passion and truth. It is the home of the Wizard Within. It is where your magical power of positive manifestation comes from.
When you tap into your own power, the power that you were born with, the parasitical power-sites lose the strength to cling on and fall by the wayside. Your energy is restored. Your life flows effortlessly. Your experiences are rich and fulfilling.
It is not a matter of eliminating your negative beliefs; it is a matter of rendering them powerless over you. Your inner power can then act as a teflon shield where negative thoughts are unable to cling onto and feed off of your innate life force.
"May the force be with you." - Han Solo to Luke, right before the attack on the Death Star battle station in Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope
That’s a very fitting episode title, "A New Hope". Reclaiming your power restores your faith in your abilities and opportunities. Reclaiming your power provides an unlimited source of energy with which to create your dreams, your inspirations, your rich in experience and delicious life. This is what you are here to do.
Valery Satterwhite is a Creative Mentor who specializes in empowering people to create more passionately, profoundly, productively and profitably. Learn how to trust your intuition, acknowledge your truth, and disarm your fear and self-doubt. Valery developed a proven unique "Inner Wizard" methodology to empower the Wizard Within to actualize and express your full creative potential. Subscribe today at http://www.InnerWizard.com. Get Free "Empower the Wizard Within tips" too!
You have the power to shape your future the way you want it to unfold. You are a magnificent and magically powerful being. You are blessed with the gift to create all that you desire to experience in this life. You live in a world rich in abundance that is yours to enjoy and to contribute your unique expression. You were given this power to enable you to assert your full potential.
When you doubt your power, you give power to your doubt. This doubt clings to you as a parasite sucking the life energy and creative force right out of you. The more doubts you have about your own ability and opportunity the more "power-sites" drain you of your power to magically create the experiences you want. You are left depleted, unable to create more than the mundane or unfulfilling experience over and over again. This pattern of creating more and more of what is not wanted only feeds the powersites. Powersites are insatiable and will consume all the power you allow them to have from the life force that is your gift and your birthright. When you give up this power to your Inner Critic, your self-doubt and fear, your Inner Critic will shape your future to mirror all that you doubt and fear.
“If you realized how powerful your thoughts are, you would never think a negative thought.” - Peace Pilgrim
Peace Pilgrim was an elderly woman who walked more that 25,000 miles on a personal pilgrimage for peace from 1953 to 1981. I cannot say whether this remarkable woman ever had a negative thought. What I can say is that every person I talk to about their life challenges has had their fair share of negative thoughts. The recent surge of self-help popularity has produced a sea of people who flog themselves if they notice a single negative thought running through their heads. "Uh-oh" they lament, "I'm having a negative thought so I must still be broken! I'm not fixed yet!"
First of all, no one is broken. No one needs to be fixed. Negative thoughts of self-doubt are natural and serve a purpose. They are indicators of whether you are moving toward or away from that which you desire. Negative thoughts are just your Inner Critic’s way of telling you that you're about to stretch and grow into a newer and bigger comfort zone and it is scared of new, unknown, places. Even if you don't particularly like the current comfort zone it's what you know and, therefore, safe.
The distinction is whether or not you give power to that negative thought by following its lead. If you do, that thought, that belief will cling onto until you consider it an integral part of your being. You will forget that this negative piece of you is a parasite rather than a birthright. With this power, the parasite will feast upon your bounty of magical gifts of inspiration, intuition, validation and self-esteem.
“He who controls others may be powerful, but he who has mastered himself is mightier still” - Lao Tzu
The next time you bathe in a negative thought process just notice it as it washes over you. Recognize it for what it is, the voice of that scared little Inner Critic who means well but is woefully misguided. Instead of giving these negative thoughts power by acting upon its lead (even if that action is a decision not to act), choose to act from a deeper place of inner power and strength. This deeper place within is the home of your wisdom, inspiration, intuition, personal passion and truth. It is the home of the Wizard Within. It is where your magical power of positive manifestation comes from.
When you tap into your own power, the power that you were born with, the parasitical power-sites lose the strength to cling on and fall by the wayside. Your energy is restored. Your life flows effortlessly. Your experiences are rich and fulfilling.
It is not a matter of eliminating your negative beliefs; it is a matter of rendering them powerless over you. Your inner power can then act as a teflon shield where negative thoughts are unable to cling onto and feed off of your innate life force.
"May the force be with you." - Han Solo to Luke, right before the attack on the Death Star battle station in Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope
That’s a very fitting episode title, "A New Hope". Reclaiming your power restores your faith in your abilities and opportunities. Reclaiming your power provides an unlimited source of energy with which to create your dreams, your inspirations, your rich in experience and delicious life. This is what you are here to do.
Valery Satterwhite is a Creative Mentor who specializes in empowering people to create more passionately, profoundly, productively and profitably. Learn how to trust your intuition, acknowledge your truth, and disarm your fear and self-doubt. Valery developed a proven unique "Inner Wizard" methodology to empower the Wizard Within to actualize and express your full creative potential. Subscribe today at http://www.InnerWizard.com. Get Free "Empower the Wizard Within tips" too!
Friday, April 24, 2009
Blocked Creatively? Here's A Get Out of Jail Free Card
The most damaging restrictions on a creative person's freedom are self-imposed. What may have started out as a new idea, a new methodology, becomes routine, a habit, after awhile. Habits are the comfort zone. Once snuggled into a comfort zone there is a tendency to stay. However, this is not what a creator is here to do. Staying in a comfort zone habitually creating the same kind of thing over and over again does not feed the artist's soul. Comfort zones are safe. Comfort zones bore creative people literally to tears. Stagnation goes flies in the face of an artist's passionate desire to expand and express their full creative potential.
Habits are not limited to craft. The greatest crippler of the creative spirit is habitual thinking. Habitual thinking turns the innovator into the academician; passion into melancholy; fulfillment into despair.
"A ship in the harbor is safe. But that's not what ships are built for." - Anon
If an artist isn't personally evolving; stretching, growing, moving beyond comfort zones, then her art isn't evolving. Stagnation suffocates the potential creative expression that is the artist's birthright. Treading water in life, not moving in any direction, is exhausting! Swimming against the stream, holding back your full creative potential, is exhausting. Let go of tired old ways of being, thinking and doing. Rediscover the playful child in you. Approach your art with the wide-eyed wonder and awe of a child at an amusement park where everything is new, exciting, waiting to be experienced. Fear and judgment is left behind. Play is what turns the utilitarian into the discoverer of new interpretation, new invention. Play is the vital heartbeat of the creative spirit.
If you think you might be treading water in life or your artistic endeavors, give yourself permission to play. Play with your craft, indulge your passions, do a silly dance. Shake up your stagnated energy. Fully alive and present, be open and available for whatever comes next. That glorious state of being is the ultimate freedom.
Valery Satterwhite is an Artist Mentor who specializes in empowering people to create more passionately, profoundly, productively and profitably. Learn how to trust your intuition, acknowledge your truth, and disarm your fear and self-doubt. Valery developed a proven unique "Inner Wizard" methodology to empower the Wizard Within to actualize and express your full creative potential. Join now at http://www.InnerWizard.com. Get Free "Inner Wizard Empowerment tips" too!
Habits are not limited to craft. The greatest crippler of the creative spirit is habitual thinking. Habitual thinking turns the innovator into the academician; passion into melancholy; fulfillment into despair.
"A ship in the harbor is safe. But that's not what ships are built for." - Anon
If an artist isn't personally evolving; stretching, growing, moving beyond comfort zones, then her art isn't evolving. Stagnation suffocates the potential creative expression that is the artist's birthright. Treading water in life, not moving in any direction, is exhausting! Swimming against the stream, holding back your full creative potential, is exhausting. Let go of tired old ways of being, thinking and doing. Rediscover the playful child in you. Approach your art with the wide-eyed wonder and awe of a child at an amusement park where everything is new, exciting, waiting to be experienced. Fear and judgment is left behind. Play is what turns the utilitarian into the discoverer of new interpretation, new invention. Play is the vital heartbeat of the creative spirit.
If you think you might be treading water in life or your artistic endeavors, give yourself permission to play. Play with your craft, indulge your passions, do a silly dance. Shake up your stagnated energy. Fully alive and present, be open and available for whatever comes next. That glorious state of being is the ultimate freedom.
Valery Satterwhite is an Artist Mentor who specializes in empowering people to create more passionately, profoundly, productively and profitably. Learn how to trust your intuition, acknowledge your truth, and disarm your fear and self-doubt. Valery developed a proven unique "Inner Wizard" methodology to empower the Wizard Within to actualize and express your full creative potential. Join now at http://www.InnerWizard.com. Get Free "Inner Wizard Empowerment tips" too!
Friday, March 20, 2009
The Inner Critic Kidnaps The Artist Soul
"Re-examine all you have been told. Dismiss what insults your Soul." - Walt Whitman
For many artists, challenges are very personal. And one of the biggest challenges is the Critic in the room, the Inner Critic. This gnarly Inner Critic is the voice of your self-doubt and fear. It is the emotional ties that bind you, hold you back, keep you stuck, limit you in what you think is possible for you as an artist. This Inner Critic will critique and beat you up more than any audience or perceived expert ever will. If allowed, this Inner Critic will suck the life force right out of you.
"Being true to yourself is what feeds creativity, not self-doubt and criticism." - Diane Arenberg
Why? Because it is a very frightened little creature. It acts nasty as a defense mechanism. What it really wants to do is crawl under a bankie with a sippy cup where it's safe; where no one will bother him.
There are many 'not safe' zones for the Inner Critic. Here are a three:
1. Starting big project that you have never done before. (What if I fail?)
2. Having a bigger presence in the public eye than it has now. (It's only a matter of time before they find out I'm not really that good.)
3. Rejection. (If they reject my art, then they reject me, and I will cease to be relevant - or even exist.)
Fear that you're not being, or won't be, acknowledged as an artist will hold you back. Fear that you're not good enough compared with other artists will choke your expression. This fear may lead to anger, bitterness and even depression. Since you're art is an expression of you, this fearful held-back state of beingness will be reflected in your art. There is a vast difference between deliberately illustrating and expressing pain, desperation, and other negative emotions and holding yourself back in your artistic expression as a result of pain, desperation and other negative emotions.
Here are some acronyms for the word FEAR (F.E.A.R.):
Finding Excuses And Reasons
- Are you procrastinating?
False Evidence Appearing Real
- Are you blaming other people or circumstances for being stuck your lack of success?
False Emotions Appearing Real
- Are you beating up on yourself for not being 'good' enough? Here's a clue: If you're feeling 'down' then there's a good chance you're beating up on yourself.
And my personal favorite (drum roll please)
F@#k Everything And Run
- Are you thinking about quitting, giving up on your pursuits as an artist?
You can deny your dreams but the outcome will be quiet desperation. The desperation becomes the safe comfort zone. You're Inner Critic will fight hard to keep you where it feels safe. You may not like the desperate comfort zone that you find yourself in but it's what you know. Safe. No surprises.
"To see far is one thing. Going there is another." - Brancusi
If you find that your in a state of FEAR there is a little trick you can apply to help you crawl out of that dark hole. You can ask yourself the following two questions:
1. What am I getting out of staying in this state? You don't do anything unless you get something out of it. What is staying right where you are in your artistic process allowing you to do?
2. Who would I be; what would I do; what would I have without this fear? Use your imagination to visualize that life. Run with it! Breathe it in.
The only thing standing between you and want you want to create for your art and your life experience is you. It's time to get out of your own way. Or, head down to Wal-Mart and get yourself a nice bankie and sippy cup. Get several. You'll be snuggled in, warm and comfy, for a long time.
"Remember, with every doubt comes a hitch in the natural flow of being." - Ian Factor
Valery Satterwhite is the Founder of the International Association for Inner Wizards. She teaches artists of all kinds how to get out of their own way, eliminate personal and professional roadblocks, so they can fully express their artistic vision and succeed in the business of art. Empower the Wizard Within, tame the Inner Critic, unleash and Inspire the Muse. Get Free Artist Resource Directory today at http://www.InnerWizard.com.
For many artists, challenges are very personal. And one of the biggest challenges is the Critic in the room, the Inner Critic. This gnarly Inner Critic is the voice of your self-doubt and fear. It is the emotional ties that bind you, hold you back, keep you stuck, limit you in what you think is possible for you as an artist. This Inner Critic will critique and beat you up more than any audience or perceived expert ever will. If allowed, this Inner Critic will suck the life force right out of you.
"Being true to yourself is what feeds creativity, not self-doubt and criticism." - Diane Arenberg
Why? Because it is a very frightened little creature. It acts nasty as a defense mechanism. What it really wants to do is crawl under a bankie with a sippy cup where it's safe; where no one will bother him.
There are many 'not safe' zones for the Inner Critic. Here are a three:
1. Starting big project that you have never done before. (What if I fail?)
2. Having a bigger presence in the public eye than it has now. (It's only a matter of time before they find out I'm not really that good.)
3. Rejection. (If they reject my art, then they reject me, and I will cease to be relevant - or even exist.)
Fear that you're not being, or won't be, acknowledged as an artist will hold you back. Fear that you're not good enough compared with other artists will choke your expression. This fear may lead to anger, bitterness and even depression. Since you're art is an expression of you, this fearful held-back state of beingness will be reflected in your art. There is a vast difference between deliberately illustrating and expressing pain, desperation, and other negative emotions and holding yourself back in your artistic expression as a result of pain, desperation and other negative emotions.
Here are some acronyms for the word FEAR (F.E.A.R.):
Finding Excuses And Reasons
- Are you procrastinating?
False Evidence Appearing Real
- Are you blaming other people or circumstances for being stuck your lack of success?
False Emotions Appearing Real
- Are you beating up on yourself for not being 'good' enough? Here's a clue: If you're feeling 'down' then there's a good chance you're beating up on yourself.
And my personal favorite (drum roll please)
F@#k Everything And Run
- Are you thinking about quitting, giving up on your pursuits as an artist?
You can deny your dreams but the outcome will be quiet desperation. The desperation becomes the safe comfort zone. You're Inner Critic will fight hard to keep you where it feels safe. You may not like the desperate comfort zone that you find yourself in but it's what you know. Safe. No surprises.
"To see far is one thing. Going there is another." - Brancusi
If you find that your in a state of FEAR there is a little trick you can apply to help you crawl out of that dark hole. You can ask yourself the following two questions:
1. What am I getting out of staying in this state? You don't do anything unless you get something out of it. What is staying right where you are in your artistic process allowing you to do?
2. Who would I be; what would I do; what would I have without this fear? Use your imagination to visualize that life. Run with it! Breathe it in.
The only thing standing between you and want you want to create for your art and your life experience is you. It's time to get out of your own way. Or, head down to Wal-Mart and get yourself a nice bankie and sippy cup. Get several. You'll be snuggled in, warm and comfy, for a long time.
"Remember, with every doubt comes a hitch in the natural flow of being." - Ian Factor
Valery Satterwhite is the Founder of the International Association for Inner Wizards. She teaches artists of all kinds how to get out of their own way, eliminate personal and professional roadblocks, so they can fully express their artistic vision and succeed in the business of art. Empower the Wizard Within, tame the Inner Critic, unleash and Inspire the Muse. Get Free Artist Resource Directory today at http://www.InnerWizard.com.
Wednesday, March 18, 2009
Are You Creatively Blocked or Are You Resisting - How to Know the Difference
Artists of every kind; painters, photographers, sculptors and actors will tell me that they are blocked. When we examine their specific challenge we discover that often they are not blocked, the are really resisting moving forward. There is a vast difference between the two. If you're struggling with your creative expression and vocation here's a way to determine whether your are blocked or unconsciously resisting as an artist.
First of all, let's take a look at what the definition of 'block' is. A block, in this context, is an obstruction; something that hinders or prevents the progress of accomplishment. Resistance, on the other hand, is the action of opposing something; a refusal to comply. We also say that something is resistant when it serves as a protective coating.
If you are blocked creatively, you may have doubts about your work, your ability to be successful, your talent. If you are resisting, you have little energy or desire to be creative and take any creative action as an artist or in the business of art. Creative blocks will come and go. Resistance can become chronic.
If you want to know whether your challenge is a block or a resistance look within. Pay attention to your self-talk, that seemingly endless chatter that is with you throughout your waking hours. If this self-talk is telling you that you're not talented or good enough to continue further then this is a block. You are in doubt, perhaps, of your ability to create what you want to express in this particular work. You're stuck, not knowing what next action to take to progressively move forward. You masterfully create distractions to take you away from your art, practice, rehearsal, audition, important meeting. And you've been doing this resisting stuff for a long time. Clearly identify the thoughts that created this blockage, this boulder. Remind yourself that this inner voice of doubt, this Inner Critic, is just a little scared of moving ahead. You're starting to stretch beyond where you've gone before and this little Inner Critic is scared so it is holding you back through inaction, indecision. Choose to take one small step in that direction, and then another, and you'll discover that you're flowing creatively again.
However, if you haven't doodled a noodle, picked up a brush, sung a song, gone to an audition or tinkled the ivories in weeks and weeks and weeks, then you're in a state of resistance. This resistance needs to be closely examined too if you wish to move beyond it. Instead of being in doubt about what's possible you are frozen in fear. What if I fail? If I continue to be an artist as my vocation will I end up living in a box by the side of the road? What if no one likes what I create? What if my work (me) is criticized publicly? Why even bother, when I'll only be rejected again. Will I die, lose my soul, give up on who I am? Deep down inside, you believe that it will be the end of the world if you continue on your path as an artist. In this state you are resisting who you are. You are resisting your own creative expression. And I'm sure you're depleted of energy, exhausted, heavy hearted. Powerless to move forward.
Yes, you are powerless because you have given up your power. If you ask yourself what within you is creating this resistance you may discover that you are shoulding all over yourself. You tell yourself constantly with that self-talk that you should do this, you should do that and yet you don't. I'm sure you have Found Excuses And Reasons (F.E.A.R.) why you can't continue on in your chosen path as an artist that is your birthright. But the truth is, you've become a victim of your fear. You've become a victim of the circumstances, events, and experiences in your life instead of the powerful creator that you are. You may even be feeling an urge to eF Everything And Run (F.E.A.R.); quit being an artist, an actor, a musician, a writer, a singer. You may have decided to 'get a real job'. Truth is, you quit on yourself and that feels terrible. And you are beating yourself up over it. And that feels even worse. This is no blocking boulder, this state is a massive wall of resistance. You are so afraid that you've literally thrown a protective blanket on your burning desires.
Again, it's time to examine your thoughts. This time, you're looking for deeper fundamental beliefs about what's possible for you to achieve as an artist. Perhaps you are reminding yourself that "you'll never earn a living as an artist" or 'artists are not business people and therefore doomed to fail".
Are the thoughts true? According to whom? How can you know, absolutely, that they are true? Can you find any evidence to the contrary? Who would you be, what would you do and what would you have if you didn't have these thoughts? For example if you're Inner Critic is telling you that you'll never earn a living as an artist, own that thought. Bring it up from your unconscious self-chatter into your consciousness. Shine light on it. Examine it. Is this true? According to whom? How can this person or these people know that this is true? Is it absolutely true that you'll never earn a living as an artist? Is any artist earning a living? Find more and more evidence that artists do, indeed, earn a living. If they can, so can you. How would you show up in your day as an artist if you didn't have that thought? What would you do? What would you create? What would success look like to you? Now be that! Hold the feeling you have as you envision yourself as a successful artist within you. Show up in your life, and as you approach your art, in that feeling state. You'll be amazed at the new inspiration, new opportunities that suddenly appear, seemingly out of nowhere for you.
So, You have a choice to make. If you are blocked, you can move beyond it. If you are resisting, you can quit. Get a real job. Tell yourself that you really don't want to be an artist and stop whining about it OR you can dissolve your fear. Which do you choose?
Valery Satterwhite is the Founder of the International Association for Inner Wizards. She teaches artists of all kinds how to get out of their own way, eliminate personal and professional roadblocks, so they can fully express their artistic vision and succeed in the business of art. Empower the Wizard Within, tame the Inner Critic, unleash and Inspire the Muse. Get Free Artist Resource Directory today at http://www.InnerWizard.com.
First of all, let's take a look at what the definition of 'block' is. A block, in this context, is an obstruction; something that hinders or prevents the progress of accomplishment. Resistance, on the other hand, is the action of opposing something; a refusal to comply. We also say that something is resistant when it serves as a protective coating.
If you are blocked creatively, you may have doubts about your work, your ability to be successful, your talent. If you are resisting, you have little energy or desire to be creative and take any creative action as an artist or in the business of art. Creative blocks will come and go. Resistance can become chronic.
If you want to know whether your challenge is a block or a resistance look within. Pay attention to your self-talk, that seemingly endless chatter that is with you throughout your waking hours. If this self-talk is telling you that you're not talented or good enough to continue further then this is a block. You are in doubt, perhaps, of your ability to create what you want to express in this particular work. You're stuck, not knowing what next action to take to progressively move forward. You masterfully create distractions to take you away from your art, practice, rehearsal, audition, important meeting. And you've been doing this resisting stuff for a long time. Clearly identify the thoughts that created this blockage, this boulder. Remind yourself that this inner voice of doubt, this Inner Critic, is just a little scared of moving ahead. You're starting to stretch beyond where you've gone before and this little Inner Critic is scared so it is holding you back through inaction, indecision. Choose to take one small step in that direction, and then another, and you'll discover that you're flowing creatively again.
However, if you haven't doodled a noodle, picked up a brush, sung a song, gone to an audition or tinkled the ivories in weeks and weeks and weeks, then you're in a state of resistance. This resistance needs to be closely examined too if you wish to move beyond it. Instead of being in doubt about what's possible you are frozen in fear. What if I fail? If I continue to be an artist as my vocation will I end up living in a box by the side of the road? What if no one likes what I create? What if my work (me) is criticized publicly? Why even bother, when I'll only be rejected again. Will I die, lose my soul, give up on who I am? Deep down inside, you believe that it will be the end of the world if you continue on your path as an artist. In this state you are resisting who you are. You are resisting your own creative expression. And I'm sure you're depleted of energy, exhausted, heavy hearted. Powerless to move forward.
Yes, you are powerless because you have given up your power. If you ask yourself what within you is creating this resistance you may discover that you are shoulding all over yourself. You tell yourself constantly with that self-talk that you should do this, you should do that and yet you don't. I'm sure you have Found Excuses And Reasons (F.E.A.R.) why you can't continue on in your chosen path as an artist that is your birthright. But the truth is, you've become a victim of your fear. You've become a victim of the circumstances, events, and experiences in your life instead of the powerful creator that you are. You may even be feeling an urge to eF Everything And Run (F.E.A.R.); quit being an artist, an actor, a musician, a writer, a singer. You may have decided to 'get a real job'. Truth is, you quit on yourself and that feels terrible. And you are beating yourself up over it. And that feels even worse. This is no blocking boulder, this state is a massive wall of resistance. You are so afraid that you've literally thrown a protective blanket on your burning desires.
Again, it's time to examine your thoughts. This time, you're looking for deeper fundamental beliefs about what's possible for you to achieve as an artist. Perhaps you are reminding yourself that "you'll never earn a living as an artist" or 'artists are not business people and therefore doomed to fail".
Are the thoughts true? According to whom? How can you know, absolutely, that they are true? Can you find any evidence to the contrary? Who would you be, what would you do and what would you have if you didn't have these thoughts? For example if you're Inner Critic is telling you that you'll never earn a living as an artist, own that thought. Bring it up from your unconscious self-chatter into your consciousness. Shine light on it. Examine it. Is this true? According to whom? How can this person or these people know that this is true? Is it absolutely true that you'll never earn a living as an artist? Is any artist earning a living? Find more and more evidence that artists do, indeed, earn a living. If they can, so can you. How would you show up in your day as an artist if you didn't have that thought? What would you do? What would you create? What would success look like to you? Now be that! Hold the feeling you have as you envision yourself as a successful artist within you. Show up in your life, and as you approach your art, in that feeling state. You'll be amazed at the new inspiration, new opportunities that suddenly appear, seemingly out of nowhere for you.
So, You have a choice to make. If you are blocked, you can move beyond it. If you are resisting, you can quit. Get a real job. Tell yourself that you really don't want to be an artist and stop whining about it OR you can dissolve your fear. Which do you choose?
Valery Satterwhite is the Founder of the International Association for Inner Wizards. She teaches artists of all kinds how to get out of their own way, eliminate personal and professional roadblocks, so they can fully express their artistic vision and succeed in the business of art. Empower the Wizard Within, tame the Inner Critic, unleash and Inspire the Muse. Get Free Artist Resource Directory today at http://www.InnerWizard.com.
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
Inner Critic: The 4 Year Old Driving Your Car
Life is a journey! It can be a easy free-flowing miraculous journey or it can be a journey of wrong turns, dead ends, crash and burns and arduous uphill routes. Some people are able to move forward in the direction of their dreams; others continue to make wrong turns or get stuck in a rut. If it's the latter chances are you have a 4-year old planning the route and driving the car. Why would you continue to let a child that can't even see over the steering wheel direct your life?
And yet you do.
Who is this child?
It is your Inner Critic. It is that well-meaning yet woefully misguided inner child. And, as a misguided child, it is frighten and doubtful about it's abilities and potential. As such, this Inner Critic serves up internal messages of self-doubt and fear as you think, feel, make choices and act as you move through your life. You, as directed by your Inner Critic, are doing the best you can. So this is not about you being at fault or to blame for the stuck in a rut or wrong turn experiences you have had. The problem lies in the map that your Inner Critic has charted for you. It's a map based on misinterpretation and it is incredibly outdated. By following this useless map, you've travelled down wrong turns, experienced crashes, dark roads and stuck up a tree or in the ditch moments. And yet you continue to use the very same map in your continued effort to get to your destination.
Albert Einstein once said, "You can't solve your problems using the same kind of thinking that created them."
You can't get to your destination using the same map that lead you to wrong turns, crashes, steep uphill slopes and ditches. It just doesn't work. You will not get to where you want to go if you keep using the same map you've been using.
So, what is this map?
The map you're using is the belief system you took on for yourself when you were a little child; starting around the age of four. You realized that you needed some guidelines to help you cope and stay safe in your environment. You don't do your homework and parent says "You'll never amount to anything." At that moment you charted a course that will lead you to "you'll never amount to anything". And you will only go down roads that lead to not amounting to anything, not accomplishing anything. You will self-sabotage your efforts to succeed.
Hey! This is not about blaming parents either! Parents are also doing the best they can. They have your best interests at heart. Young children do not typically understand context. They make broad generalizations out of what they see, hear and feel. I ask parents if they've ever said anything that their child has completely misinterpreted and the answer is always, Yes! Children misinterpret things. You misinterpreted a lot of what you saw, heard and felt.
A well-meaning teacher will say, "Johnny will have to go to the end of the line because his behavior was bad today." And Johnny's map adds the route of "I'm a bad person and should be at the end of the line." And so he goes through life going down roads that will make sure he stays at the end of the line. These roads are the choices that you make based on your map, your thought processes, what you believe about yourself and the world. And it is all based on misguided misinterpretation.
Even if you had a parent who looked you straight in the eye every day and, with clear intention, said "you are worthless" and that's exactly what they meant -- it doesn't make it true. You are the one who took on the validity of that statement and made it part of your map. And you've gone through life limiting what's possible for you because you don't believe you deserve what you want to achieve.
"All our knowledge has its origins in our perceptions." - Leonardo da Vinci
Time to throw out the map and get a new one, with a better charted route!
No, don't throw the Inner Critic out of the car! It's part of you. It loves you and was only trying to protect you and keep you safe in your well mapped comfort zone. Just remove the Inner Critic from the driver's seat. Put him in the back seat with a bankie and a sippy cup. You are going to do the driving from now on.
But, with what map?
Yes, you'll need a map. Remember, the map is your thought patterns and belief systems. If you've been going down the road of "you'll never amount to anything' examine your life. Look for experiences where you have accomplished something. Heck, you've learned how to read or you wouldn't be able to read this article. You've learned how to use a computer too! I'll bet you know how to walk and talk. If you had that Inner Critic map when you were just learning how to walk and talk you wouldn't be able to walk and talk very well today. One fall on your butt or one person correcting your words would have sent you immediately off course because the map was taking you down the road of "You see, you'll never amount to anything. You'll never be able to learn how to walk and talk. You might as well give up. Quit now."
The truth is, you've accomplished a lot in your life. If you notice that you've been down the road of "I can't" look for evidence of when "you could". Change your map from "I can't because" to "I can because". Focus on all the experiences of "I can" that you've had in your life. Look at all the other people who have had the "I can" experience. If they can, so can you!
Deliberately and mindfully changing your perspective of who you are, what you can do, and what is possible for your life experience is the way to chart the course that will absolutely, positively effortlessly take you to your destination. And you might even decide upon a better and bigger place to go!
"You have brains in your head.
You have feet in your shoes.
You can steer yourself any direction you choose.
You’re on your own. And you know what you know. And YOU are the guy who’ll decide where to go."
- excerpt from "Oh! The Places You’ll Go!" by Dr. Seuss
Valery Satterwhite is the Founder of the International Association for Inner Wizards. The greatest gift Membership can give you is to reaffirm the integrity of your own being. Within you lies all the knowledge about who you are, including your challenges and desires. The ultimate mission of the International Association for Inner Wizards is to reconnect you with the incredible power that is already within you and to encourage you to recognize it, use it and rely upon this resource that is your birthright. We simply deliver back to you that which is already your own. I guarantee no wrong turns will be made on your life's journey when you are empowered and guided by your Inner Wizard, your muse and personal guidance system. Get free mini-book "Discover Your Inner Wizard" today at http://www.InnerWizard.com.
And yet you do.
Who is this child?
It is your Inner Critic. It is that well-meaning yet woefully misguided inner child. And, as a misguided child, it is frighten and doubtful about it's abilities and potential. As such, this Inner Critic serves up internal messages of self-doubt and fear as you think, feel, make choices and act as you move through your life. You, as directed by your Inner Critic, are doing the best you can. So this is not about you being at fault or to blame for the stuck in a rut or wrong turn experiences you have had. The problem lies in the map that your Inner Critic has charted for you. It's a map based on misinterpretation and it is incredibly outdated. By following this useless map, you've travelled down wrong turns, experienced crashes, dark roads and stuck up a tree or in the ditch moments. And yet you continue to use the very same map in your continued effort to get to your destination.
Albert Einstein once said, "You can't solve your problems using the same kind of thinking that created them."
You can't get to your destination using the same map that lead you to wrong turns, crashes, steep uphill slopes and ditches. It just doesn't work. You will not get to where you want to go if you keep using the same map you've been using.
So, what is this map?
The map you're using is the belief system you took on for yourself when you were a little child; starting around the age of four. You realized that you needed some guidelines to help you cope and stay safe in your environment. You don't do your homework and parent says "You'll never amount to anything." At that moment you charted a course that will lead you to "you'll never amount to anything". And you will only go down roads that lead to not amounting to anything, not accomplishing anything. You will self-sabotage your efforts to succeed.
Hey! This is not about blaming parents either! Parents are also doing the best they can. They have your best interests at heart. Young children do not typically understand context. They make broad generalizations out of what they see, hear and feel. I ask parents if they've ever said anything that their child has completely misinterpreted and the answer is always, Yes! Children misinterpret things. You misinterpreted a lot of what you saw, heard and felt.
A well-meaning teacher will say, "Johnny will have to go to the end of the line because his behavior was bad today." And Johnny's map adds the route of "I'm a bad person and should be at the end of the line." And so he goes through life going down roads that will make sure he stays at the end of the line. These roads are the choices that you make based on your map, your thought processes, what you believe about yourself and the world. And it is all based on misguided misinterpretation.
Even if you had a parent who looked you straight in the eye every day and, with clear intention, said "you are worthless" and that's exactly what they meant -- it doesn't make it true. You are the one who took on the validity of that statement and made it part of your map. And you've gone through life limiting what's possible for you because you don't believe you deserve what you want to achieve.
"All our knowledge has its origins in our perceptions." - Leonardo da Vinci
Time to throw out the map and get a new one, with a better charted route!
No, don't throw the Inner Critic out of the car! It's part of you. It loves you and was only trying to protect you and keep you safe in your well mapped comfort zone. Just remove the Inner Critic from the driver's seat. Put him in the back seat with a bankie and a sippy cup. You are going to do the driving from now on.
But, with what map?
Yes, you'll need a map. Remember, the map is your thought patterns and belief systems. If you've been going down the road of "you'll never amount to anything' examine your life. Look for experiences where you have accomplished something. Heck, you've learned how to read or you wouldn't be able to read this article. You've learned how to use a computer too! I'll bet you know how to walk and talk. If you had that Inner Critic map when you were just learning how to walk and talk you wouldn't be able to walk and talk very well today. One fall on your butt or one person correcting your words would have sent you immediately off course because the map was taking you down the road of "You see, you'll never amount to anything. You'll never be able to learn how to walk and talk. You might as well give up. Quit now."
The truth is, you've accomplished a lot in your life. If you notice that you've been down the road of "I can't" look for evidence of when "you could". Change your map from "I can't because" to "I can because". Focus on all the experiences of "I can" that you've had in your life. Look at all the other people who have had the "I can" experience. If they can, so can you!
Deliberately and mindfully changing your perspective of who you are, what you can do, and what is possible for your life experience is the way to chart the course that will absolutely, positively effortlessly take you to your destination. And you might even decide upon a better and bigger place to go!
"You have brains in your head.
You have feet in your shoes.
You can steer yourself any direction you choose.
You’re on your own. And you know what you know. And YOU are the guy who’ll decide where to go."
- excerpt from "Oh! The Places You’ll Go!" by Dr. Seuss
Valery Satterwhite is the Founder of the International Association for Inner Wizards. The greatest gift Membership can give you is to reaffirm the integrity of your own being. Within you lies all the knowledge about who you are, including your challenges and desires. The ultimate mission of the International Association for Inner Wizards is to reconnect you with the incredible power that is already within you and to encourage you to recognize it, use it and rely upon this resource that is your birthright. We simply deliver back to you that which is already your own. I guarantee no wrong turns will be made on your life's journey when you are empowered and guided by your Inner Wizard, your muse and personal guidance system. Get free mini-book "Discover Your Inner Wizard" today at http://www.InnerWizard.com.
Monday, February 16, 2009
Aging: A Powerful Beauty Tip
In today's abundance of beauty lotions and potions, nips and tucks, that serve to resist and camouflage the signs of aging we rob ourselves of the most powerful beauty enhancement resource available to mankind. I'm speaking of the aging process itself.
The prevailing and repetitive message we get in today's media and societal consciousness is that youth is good; old age is bad. Youth is viewed as vibrant and desirable whereas old age is considered a burden and a deterioration of the body and soul. People fear aging and believe that if youth is relevant, they will become irrelevant in the autumn of their lives. Beliefs about age, like other beliefs, shape your experience. If young adulthood is considered the best time of life then old age is viewed as the opposite, a time of failure and decay.
Many who follow such beliefs try to hide from themselves desperately trying to be and stay young. The look upon their reflection in the mirror with horror as they watch their face slowly slide off of their face as the skin loses its elasticity. Some people fear aging so much that they are willing to slice and dice themselves into a sometimes unrecognizable appearance to ward off any evidence of the birthdays celebrated.
I get that people want to look the best they can. I want to look the best I can. Looking your best is about showing your finest self, not resisting yourself or even denying who you are and have become. The truth is, youth and old age have their place within the framework of spiritual growth. Each plays an important role. Old age is a highly creative part of living. People sometimes misinterpret the return to the playful appreciation of life expressed by many in their elder years as a sign of a detachment from the busy and 'relevant' world.
When a person becomes older and retires the mind is freed to use more, not less, of its abilities. There is a return to the luxury of creating with abandon. Shoulds and 'must dos' give way to whimsy. Some believe that this change is a sign of mental deterioration and think that their age has betrayed them, made them less than in some way. Some elderly people give into these beliefs as they view themselves as leftovers, shadows of their better selves and useless. The sad thing is many elderly people allow themselves to become their beliefs to conform to the societal definition of old age.
My father celebrated his 93rd birthday a few months ago. I flew to Miami to be with him on his birthday. While I love my Father dearly we've had a delicate relationship over the years. He didn't know what to make of me and I viewed him as cold and cantankerous. As I aged I realized that the two of us were stuck in what we thought a father and daughter 'should be' instead of allowing ourselves to experience who we are. Over the years my visits with my father seemed to be about whether or not I had a man in my life yet or whether or not my paycheck was big enough. I don't know what his perspectives of our visits were. I wouldn't be surprised if he felt that I didn't see him for who he was either. Truth is, I didn't.
What I saw before me on the day of my Father's 93rd birthday was a man with a glimmer in his eye, several jokes up his sleeve and an appreciation for that moment in time. And he was excited about the day ahead. What a delight! Here was the Father I had always wanted. He was there all the time. I never knew it. I never saw it. While he was busy being relevant in his younger working years, he let go of his creative joyful spirit. In his old age, he allowed himself to return to a state of grace. A state of grace is relevant, vibrant, influential and inspirational if we just take a moment to acknowledge the gift before and within us.
Grace is beautiful. People who live within a state of grace are beautiful. In the years spent busy building careers and hanging onto youth for dear life we are often in anything but a state of grace. We're stressed, restless, desperate, agitated; so busy busy busy doing that we forget about being. Embracing the approach of old age restores our state of graceful being-ness and the light within us shines. Nothing is more beautiful.
Perhaps one day society will cherish and value the wisdom and state of grace found in old age. Perhaps one day we will allow ourselves to openly rejoice our advancing years. Perhaps that day is today.
Valery Satterwhite is the Founder of the International Association for Inner Wizards. The greatest gift Membership can give you is to reaffirm the integrity of your own being. Within you lies all the knowledge about who you are, including your challenges and desires. The ultimate mission of the International Association for Inner Wizards is to reconnect you with the incredible power that is already within you and to encourage you to recognize it, use it and rely upon this resource that is your birthright. We simply deliver back to you that which is already your own. I guarantee no wrong turns will be made on your life's journey when you are empowered and guided by your Inner Wizard, your muse and personal guidance system. Get free mini-book "Discover Your Inner Wizard" today at http://www.InnerWizard.com.
The prevailing and repetitive message we get in today's media and societal consciousness is that youth is good; old age is bad. Youth is viewed as vibrant and desirable whereas old age is considered a burden and a deterioration of the body and soul. People fear aging and believe that if youth is relevant, they will become irrelevant in the autumn of their lives. Beliefs about age, like other beliefs, shape your experience. If young adulthood is considered the best time of life then old age is viewed as the opposite, a time of failure and decay.
Many who follow such beliefs try to hide from themselves desperately trying to be and stay young. The look upon their reflection in the mirror with horror as they watch their face slowly slide off of their face as the skin loses its elasticity. Some people fear aging so much that they are willing to slice and dice themselves into a sometimes unrecognizable appearance to ward off any evidence of the birthdays celebrated.
I get that people want to look the best they can. I want to look the best I can. Looking your best is about showing your finest self, not resisting yourself or even denying who you are and have become. The truth is, youth and old age have their place within the framework of spiritual growth. Each plays an important role. Old age is a highly creative part of living. People sometimes misinterpret the return to the playful appreciation of life expressed by many in their elder years as a sign of a detachment from the busy and 'relevant' world.
When a person becomes older and retires the mind is freed to use more, not less, of its abilities. There is a return to the luxury of creating with abandon. Shoulds and 'must dos' give way to whimsy. Some believe that this change is a sign of mental deterioration and think that their age has betrayed them, made them less than in some way. Some elderly people give into these beliefs as they view themselves as leftovers, shadows of their better selves and useless. The sad thing is many elderly people allow themselves to become their beliefs to conform to the societal definition of old age.
My father celebrated his 93rd birthday a few months ago. I flew to Miami to be with him on his birthday. While I love my Father dearly we've had a delicate relationship over the years. He didn't know what to make of me and I viewed him as cold and cantankerous. As I aged I realized that the two of us were stuck in what we thought a father and daughter 'should be' instead of allowing ourselves to experience who we are. Over the years my visits with my father seemed to be about whether or not I had a man in my life yet or whether or not my paycheck was big enough. I don't know what his perspectives of our visits were. I wouldn't be surprised if he felt that I didn't see him for who he was either. Truth is, I didn't.
What I saw before me on the day of my Father's 93rd birthday was a man with a glimmer in his eye, several jokes up his sleeve and an appreciation for that moment in time. And he was excited about the day ahead. What a delight! Here was the Father I had always wanted. He was there all the time. I never knew it. I never saw it. While he was busy being relevant in his younger working years, he let go of his creative joyful spirit. In his old age, he allowed himself to return to a state of grace. A state of grace is relevant, vibrant, influential and inspirational if we just take a moment to acknowledge the gift before and within us.
Grace is beautiful. People who live within a state of grace are beautiful. In the years spent busy building careers and hanging onto youth for dear life we are often in anything but a state of grace. We're stressed, restless, desperate, agitated; so busy busy busy doing that we forget about being. Embracing the approach of old age restores our state of graceful being-ness and the light within us shines. Nothing is more beautiful.
Perhaps one day society will cherish and value the wisdom and state of grace found in old age. Perhaps one day we will allow ourselves to openly rejoice our advancing years. Perhaps that day is today.
Valery Satterwhite is the Founder of the International Association for Inner Wizards. The greatest gift Membership can give you is to reaffirm the integrity of your own being. Within you lies all the knowledge about who you are, including your challenges and desires. The ultimate mission of the International Association for Inner Wizards is to reconnect you with the incredible power that is already within you and to encourage you to recognize it, use it and rely upon this resource that is your birthright. We simply deliver back to you that which is already your own. I guarantee no wrong turns will be made on your life's journey when you are empowered and guided by your Inner Wizard, your muse and personal guidance system. Get free mini-book "Discover Your Inner Wizard" today at http://www.InnerWizard.com.
Wednesday, February 11, 2009
Lousy Childhood? Now You Can Be Your Own Parent
You want to improve your life. You're sick and tired of being sick and tired. You are willing to make changes as long as these changes don't disturb what is already comfortable. And you don't want improvement to require a lot of work. You want a quick fix. And you may not realize that even though you don't like it you're quiet comfortable in your sick and tired of being sick and tired existence. So you unknowingly fight back to stay right where you are.
And in that place of right where you are, your head is filled with "I should do" or "I'm supposed to be" thoughts. This self-defeating attitude weighs heavily on your daily experience. I'm not, not, not and I should, should, should. All day long.
You should according to whom? Are you playing the vocal soundtrack of parents, teachers and other well-meaning advisors telling you what you should want, should do, and should have in your life? "You should do this." "You can't have that." "You can't be a whatever and make money." Do you even stop to consider if you even want have, be or do what they suggest? And what you are now telling yourself endlessly that you are not that you should?
Who is really should-ing on you?
YOU!
Stop shoulding on yourself! Those shoulds and must do's are limiting and defeating. They range from unsupportive to ridicule and judgment. Sometimes well intentioned shoulds and musts dictated to you by others are abusive. They can penetrate deeply with hurt, pain and feelings of inadequacy. Self-defeating statements violate who you are. Your self-talk agreement with these statements only serve to separate you from what you really want and, thus, can suck the life energy right out of you. You spend your life swimming upstream fighting against what you really want to reach what you should or must want. And you're tired. And you're sick and tired of being sick and tired.
Stop playing the beat of the should drum that obviously isn't working for you. Be willing to move beyond this comfortable yet unfulfilling spot and play a new tune. You're an adult now. You no longer have to listen to parents and others as you deliberately create the life that you want to experience. Look for evidence of people who can and are doing what you've been told is impossible for you. If they can be, do or have it so can you.
Get out of your comfort zone. Become your own parent. That's your quick fix. Give yourself encouragement to support your real wants in life and give yourself plenty of positive feedback as you move towards reaching your goals, your desires, the life of your dreams.
"The intuitive mind is a sacred gift and the rational mind is a faithful servant. We have created a society that honors the servant and has forgotten the gift." - Albert Einstein
Valery is the Founder of the International Association for Inner Wizards. The greatest gift Membership can give you is to reaffirm the integrity of your own being. Within you lies all the knowledge about who you are, including your challenges and desires. The ultimate mission of the International Association for Inner Wizards is to reconnect you with the incredible power that is already within you and to encourage you to recognize it, use it and rely upon this resource that is your birthright. We simply deliver back to you that which is already your own. I guarantee no wrong turns will be made on your life's journey when you are empowered and guided by your Inner Wizard. Get free mini-book "Discover Your Inner Wizard" today at http://www.InnerWizard.com.
And in that place of right where you are, your head is filled with "I should do" or "I'm supposed to be" thoughts. This self-defeating attitude weighs heavily on your daily experience. I'm not, not, not and I should, should, should. All day long.
You should according to whom? Are you playing the vocal soundtrack of parents, teachers and other well-meaning advisors telling you what you should want, should do, and should have in your life? "You should do this." "You can't have that." "You can't be a whatever and make money." Do you even stop to consider if you even want have, be or do what they suggest? And what you are now telling yourself endlessly that you are not that you should?
Who is really should-ing on you?
YOU!
Stop shoulding on yourself! Those shoulds and must do's are limiting and defeating. They range from unsupportive to ridicule and judgment. Sometimes well intentioned shoulds and musts dictated to you by others are abusive. They can penetrate deeply with hurt, pain and feelings of inadequacy. Self-defeating statements violate who you are. Your self-talk agreement with these statements only serve to separate you from what you really want and, thus, can suck the life energy right out of you. You spend your life swimming upstream fighting against what you really want to reach what you should or must want. And you're tired. And you're sick and tired of being sick and tired.
Stop playing the beat of the should drum that obviously isn't working for you. Be willing to move beyond this comfortable yet unfulfilling spot and play a new tune. You're an adult now. You no longer have to listen to parents and others as you deliberately create the life that you want to experience. Look for evidence of people who can and are doing what you've been told is impossible for you. If they can be, do or have it so can you.
Get out of your comfort zone. Become your own parent. That's your quick fix. Give yourself encouragement to support your real wants in life and give yourself plenty of positive feedback as you move towards reaching your goals, your desires, the life of your dreams.
"The intuitive mind is a sacred gift and the rational mind is a faithful servant. We have created a society that honors the servant and has forgotten the gift." - Albert Einstein
Valery is the Founder of the International Association for Inner Wizards. The greatest gift Membership can give you is to reaffirm the integrity of your own being. Within you lies all the knowledge about who you are, including your challenges and desires. The ultimate mission of the International Association for Inner Wizards is to reconnect you with the incredible power that is already within you and to encourage you to recognize it, use it and rely upon this resource that is your birthright. We simply deliver back to you that which is already your own. I guarantee no wrong turns will be made on your life's journey when you are empowered and guided by your Inner Wizard. Get free mini-book "Discover Your Inner Wizard" today at http://www.InnerWizard.com.
Lousy Childhood? Now You Can Be Your Own Parent
You want to improve your life. You're sick and tired of being sick and tired. You are willing to make changes as long as these changes don't disturb what is already comfortable. And you don't want improvement to require a lot of work. You want a quick fix. And you may not realize that even though you don't like it you're quiet comfortable in your sick and tired of being sick and tired existence. So you unknowingly fight back to stay right where you are.
And in that place of right where you are, your head is filled with "I should do" or "I'm supposed to be" thoughts. This self-defeating attitude weighs heavily on your daily experience. I'm not, not, not and I should, should, should. All day long.
You should according to whom? Are you playing the vocal soundtrack of parents, teachers and other well-meaning advisors telling you what you should want, should do, and should have in your life? "You should do this." "You can't have that." "You can't be a whatever and make money." Do you even stop to consider if you even want have, be or do what they suggest? And what you are now telling yourself endlessly that you are not that you should?
Who is really should-ing on you?
YOU!
Stop shoulding on yourself! Those shoulds and must do's are limiting and defeating. They range from unsupportive to ridicule and judgment. Sometimes well intentioned shoulds and musts dictated to you by others are abusive. They can penetrate deeply with hurt, pain and feelings of inadequacy. Self-defeating statements violate who you are. Your self-talk agreement with these statements only serve to separate you from what you really want and, thus, can suck the life energy right out of you. You spend your life swimming upstream fighting against what you really want to reach what you should or must want. And you're tired. And you're sick and tired of being sick and tired.
Stop playing the beat of the should drum that obviously isn't working for you. Be willing to move beyond this comfortable yet unfulfilling spot and play a new tune. You're an adult now. You no longer have to listen to parents and others as you deliberately create the life that you want to experience. Look for evidence of people who can and are doing what you've been told is impossible for you. If they can be, do or have it so can you.
Get out of your comfort zone. Become your own parent. That's your quick fix. Give yourself encouragement to support your real wants in life and give yourself plenty of positive feedback as you move towards reaching your goals, your desires, the life of your dreams.
"The intuitive mind is a sacred gift and the rational mind is a faithful servant. We have created a society that honors the servant and has forgotten the gift." - Albert Einstein
Valery is the Founder of the International Association for Inner Wizards. The greatest gift Membership can give you is to reaffirm the integrity of your own being. Within you lies all the knowledge about who you are, including your challenges and desires. The ultimate mission of the International Association for Inner Wizards is to reconnect you with the incredible power that is already within you and to encourage you to recognize it, use it and rely upon this resource that is your birthright. We simply deliver back to you that which is already your own. I guarantee no wrong turns will be made on your life's journey when you are empowered and guided by your Inner Wizard. Get free mini-book "Discover Your Inner Wizard" today at http://www.InnerWizard.com.
And in that place of right where you are, your head is filled with "I should do" or "I'm supposed to be" thoughts. This self-defeating attitude weighs heavily on your daily experience. I'm not, not, not and I should, should, should. All day long.
You should according to whom? Are you playing the vocal soundtrack of parents, teachers and other well-meaning advisors telling you what you should want, should do, and should have in your life? "You should do this." "You can't have that." "You can't be a whatever and make money." Do you even stop to consider if you even want have, be or do what they suggest? And what you are now telling yourself endlessly that you are not that you should?
Who is really should-ing on you?
YOU!
Stop shoulding on yourself! Those shoulds and must do's are limiting and defeating. They range from unsupportive to ridicule and judgment. Sometimes well intentioned shoulds and musts dictated to you by others are abusive. They can penetrate deeply with hurt, pain and feelings of inadequacy. Self-defeating statements violate who you are. Your self-talk agreement with these statements only serve to separate you from what you really want and, thus, can suck the life energy right out of you. You spend your life swimming upstream fighting against what you really want to reach what you should or must want. And you're tired. And you're sick and tired of being sick and tired.
Stop playing the beat of the should drum that obviously isn't working for you. Be willing to move beyond this comfortable yet unfulfilling spot and play a new tune. You're an adult now. You no longer have to listen to parents and others as you deliberately create the life that you want to experience. Look for evidence of people who can and are doing what you've been told is impossible for you. If they can be, do or have it so can you.
Get out of your comfort zone. Become your own parent. That's your quick fix. Give yourself encouragement to support your real wants in life and give yourself plenty of positive feedback as you move towards reaching your goals, your desires, the life of your dreams.
"The intuitive mind is a sacred gift and the rational mind is a faithful servant. We have created a society that honors the servant and has forgotten the gift." - Albert Einstein
Valery is the Founder of the International Association for Inner Wizards. The greatest gift Membership can give you is to reaffirm the integrity of your own being. Within you lies all the knowledge about who you are, including your challenges and desires. The ultimate mission of the International Association for Inner Wizards is to reconnect you with the incredible power that is already within you and to encourage you to recognize it, use it and rely upon this resource that is your birthright. We simply deliver back to you that which is already your own. I guarantee no wrong turns will be made on your life's journey when you are empowered and guided by your Inner Wizard. Get free mini-book "Discover Your Inner Wizard" today at http://www.InnerWizard.com.
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
Stop Putting Up With, Start Living
Are you putting up with things in your life that annoy you or drains the energy right out of you? A good majority of people have been carrying around suitcases filled with unfinished projects and things they are tolerating. You could be tolerating an annoying neighbor, excess weight, or a bad choice of home decor. These are things that get in your way and keep you from living the life of your dreams.
You tolerate what you don't like at home, work and in your personal life. You don't like these things but you tolerate them anyway. You don't like the stack of paper that's piled up high on your desk. You get frustrated when you can't find what you want to wear in your disorganized closet. You dread the long commute to work. Your car rattles as you drive and you tolerate the noise in stead of taking it in for repair. Are there science projects growing in your refrigerator?
These are the things that, for whatever reason, you tolerate in your life. Sometimes, they’re minor inconveniences like a dripping faucet or a friend that never shows up on time. People put up with, accept, take on and are burdened by other people's behaviors, circumstances, unfinished business, problems, and 'stuff'. People tolerate their own negative behavior even if they don't like how they are behaving.
People tolerate old and no longer necessary thoughts and belief systems. There are even people who tolerate serious things like physical or emotional abuse. Why is that?
You do not do anything unless you get something out of it. Yes, you are getting something out of tolerating what you are putting up with in your life. What does tolerating allow you to be, do and have. If you examine your tolerations you will Find Excuses And Reasons (F.E.A.R.) to justify the toleration. It comes down to a basic fear of moving beyond your current comfort zone. You don't like your current comfort zone that includes the things you put up with but its what you know and, therefore, safe. No surprises.
So what are you tolerating?
Take some time to look at your life as it is right now. What are you tolerating that you’d rather be rid of? Make a list of what you have in your life that you do not want yet are tolerating. As you think of more items, add them to your list. What are you getting out of putting up with these things, these experiences? What would happen if you stopped tolerating and made appropriate changes? Who would you be, what would you have and what could you do if you were no longer tolerating these things? What is stopping you from stopping your toleration?
As you clear out the clutter, the incompletes, the stuff you put up with you will create a clear path and space to bring in the things and experiences you do want to have in your life. If you want to embark on a road to personal growth and abundant living then you have to clear your runway. Get rid of the debris of tolerations so you can take off and soar!
Valery is the Founder of the International Association for Inner Wizards. The greatest gift Membership can give you is to reaffirm the integrity of your own being. Within you lies all the knowledge about who you are, including your challenges and desires. The ultimate mission of the International Association for Inner Wizards is to reconnect you with the incredible power that is already within you and to encourage you to recognize it, use it and rely upon this resource that is your birthright. We simply deliver back to you that which is already your own. I guarantee no wrong turns will be made on your life's journey when you are empowered and guided by your Inner Wizard. Get free mini-book "Discover Your Inner Wizard" today at http://www.InnerWizard.com.
You tolerate what you don't like at home, work and in your personal life. You don't like these things but you tolerate them anyway. You don't like the stack of paper that's piled up high on your desk. You get frustrated when you can't find what you want to wear in your disorganized closet. You dread the long commute to work. Your car rattles as you drive and you tolerate the noise in stead of taking it in for repair. Are there science projects growing in your refrigerator?
These are the things that, for whatever reason, you tolerate in your life. Sometimes, they’re minor inconveniences like a dripping faucet or a friend that never shows up on time. People put up with, accept, take on and are burdened by other people's behaviors, circumstances, unfinished business, problems, and 'stuff'. People tolerate their own negative behavior even if they don't like how they are behaving.
People tolerate old and no longer necessary thoughts and belief systems. There are even people who tolerate serious things like physical or emotional abuse. Why is that?
You do not do anything unless you get something out of it. Yes, you are getting something out of tolerating what you are putting up with in your life. What does tolerating allow you to be, do and have. If you examine your tolerations you will Find Excuses And Reasons (F.E.A.R.) to justify the toleration. It comes down to a basic fear of moving beyond your current comfort zone. You don't like your current comfort zone that includes the things you put up with but its what you know and, therefore, safe. No surprises.
So what are you tolerating?
Take some time to look at your life as it is right now. What are you tolerating that you’d rather be rid of? Make a list of what you have in your life that you do not want yet are tolerating. As you think of more items, add them to your list. What are you getting out of putting up with these things, these experiences? What would happen if you stopped tolerating and made appropriate changes? Who would you be, what would you have and what could you do if you were no longer tolerating these things? What is stopping you from stopping your toleration?
As you clear out the clutter, the incompletes, the stuff you put up with you will create a clear path and space to bring in the things and experiences you do want to have in your life. If you want to embark on a road to personal growth and abundant living then you have to clear your runway. Get rid of the debris of tolerations so you can take off and soar!
Valery is the Founder of the International Association for Inner Wizards. The greatest gift Membership can give you is to reaffirm the integrity of your own being. Within you lies all the knowledge about who you are, including your challenges and desires. The ultimate mission of the International Association for Inner Wizards is to reconnect you with the incredible power that is already within you and to encourage you to recognize it, use it and rely upon this resource that is your birthright. We simply deliver back to you that which is already your own. I guarantee no wrong turns will be made on your life's journey when you are empowered and guided by your Inner Wizard. Get free mini-book "Discover Your Inner Wizard" today at http://www.InnerWizard.com.
Stop Tolerating, Start Living
Are you putting up with things in your life that annoy you or drains the energy right out of you? A good majority of people have been carrying around suitcases filled with unfinished projects and things they are tolerating. You could be tolerating an annoying neighbor, excess weight, or a bad choice of home decor. These are things that get in your way and keep you from living the life of your dreams.
You tolerate what you don't like at home, work and in your personal life. You don't like these things but you tolerate them anyway. You don't like the stack of paper that's piled up high on your desk. You get frustrated when you can't find what you want to wear in your disorganized closet. You dread the long commute to work. Your car rattles as you drive and you tolerate the noise in stead of taking it in for repair. Are there science projects growing in your refrigerator?
These are the things that, for whatever reason, you tolerate in your life. Sometimes, they’re minor inconveniences like a dripping faucet or a friend that never shows up on time. People put up with, accept, take on and are burdened by other people's behaviors, circumstances, unfinished business, problems, and 'stuff'. People tolerate their own negative behavior even if they don't like how they are behaving.
People tolerate old and no longer necessary thoughts and belief systems. There are even people who tolerate serious things like physical or emotional abuse. Why is that?
You do not do anything unless you get something out of it. Yes, you are getting something out of tolerating what you are putting up with in your life. What does tolerating allow you to be, do and have. If you examine your tolerations you will Find Excuses And Reasons (F.E.A.R.) to justify the toleration. It comes down to a basic fear of moving beyond your current comfort zone. You don't like your current comfort zone that includes the things you put up with but its what you know and, therefore, safe. No surprises.
So what are you tolerating?
Take some time to look at your life as it is right now. What are you tolerating that you’d rather be rid of? Make a list of what you have in your life that you do not want yet are tolerating. As you think of more items, add them to your list. What are you getting out of putting up with these things, these experiences? What would happen if you stopped tolerating and made appropriate changes? Who would you be, what would you have and what could you do if you were no longer tolerating these things? What is stopping you from stopping your toleration?
As you clear out the clutter, the incompletes, the stuff you put up with you will create a clear path and space to bring in the things and experiences you do want to have in your life. If you want to embark on a road to personal growth and abundant living then you have to clear your runway. Get rid of the debris of tolerations so you can take off and soar!
Valery is the Founder of the International Association for Inner Wizards. The greatest gift Membership can give you is to reaffirm the integrity of your own being. Within you lies all the knowledge about who you are, including your challenges and desires. The ultimate mission of the International Association for Inner Wizards is to reconnect you with the incredible power that is already within you and to encourage you to recognize it, use it and rely upon this resource that is your birthright. We simply deliver back to you that which is already your own. I guarantee no wrong turns will be made on your life's journey when you are empowered and guided by your Inner Wizard. Get free mini-book "Discover Your Inner Wizard" today at http://www.InnerWizard.com.
You tolerate what you don't like at home, work and in your personal life. You don't like these things but you tolerate them anyway. You don't like the stack of paper that's piled up high on your desk. You get frustrated when you can't find what you want to wear in your disorganized closet. You dread the long commute to work. Your car rattles as you drive and you tolerate the noise in stead of taking it in for repair. Are there science projects growing in your refrigerator?
These are the things that, for whatever reason, you tolerate in your life. Sometimes, they’re minor inconveniences like a dripping faucet or a friend that never shows up on time. People put up with, accept, take on and are burdened by other people's behaviors, circumstances, unfinished business, problems, and 'stuff'. People tolerate their own negative behavior even if they don't like how they are behaving.
People tolerate old and no longer necessary thoughts and belief systems. There are even people who tolerate serious things like physical or emotional abuse. Why is that?
You do not do anything unless you get something out of it. Yes, you are getting something out of tolerating what you are putting up with in your life. What does tolerating allow you to be, do and have. If you examine your tolerations you will Find Excuses And Reasons (F.E.A.R.) to justify the toleration. It comes down to a basic fear of moving beyond your current comfort zone. You don't like your current comfort zone that includes the things you put up with but its what you know and, therefore, safe. No surprises.
So what are you tolerating?
Take some time to look at your life as it is right now. What are you tolerating that you’d rather be rid of? Make a list of what you have in your life that you do not want yet are tolerating. As you think of more items, add them to your list. What are you getting out of putting up with these things, these experiences? What would happen if you stopped tolerating and made appropriate changes? Who would you be, what would you have and what could you do if you were no longer tolerating these things? What is stopping you from stopping your toleration?
As you clear out the clutter, the incompletes, the stuff you put up with you will create a clear path and space to bring in the things and experiences you do want to have in your life. If you want to embark on a road to personal growth and abundant living then you have to clear your runway. Get rid of the debris of tolerations so you can take off and soar!
Valery is the Founder of the International Association for Inner Wizards. The greatest gift Membership can give you is to reaffirm the integrity of your own being. Within you lies all the knowledge about who you are, including your challenges and desires. The ultimate mission of the International Association for Inner Wizards is to reconnect you with the incredible power that is already within you and to encourage you to recognize it, use it and rely upon this resource that is your birthright. We simply deliver back to you that which is already your own. I guarantee no wrong turns will be made on your life's journey when you are empowered and guided by your Inner Wizard. Get free mini-book "Discover Your Inner Wizard" today at http://www.InnerWizard.com.
Saturday, February 7, 2009
The Ego: A Misguided Inner Critic
I spent several weeks envisioning a graphical image of the Inner Critic. I worked with a fabulous cartoonist, Gary Cooper of Cooptoons, to create a gnarly looking, yet lovable and fun creature. I wanted something that at first glance looked scary and at the second glance looked hug-able. The Inner Critic is really a frightened little child. And this frighten little child has the job of keeping you safe and happy. While it means well, this Inner Critic is woefully misguided. It thinks that what will keep you safe and happy is to keep you stuck, right where you are, in your current comfort zone. It knows that you may not like your current comfort zone but it's what the Inner Critic knows and so it feels safe. The Inner Critic will resist, throw a fit of drama, if you try to stretch, grow and move beyond your current comfort zone.
When you observe the ego in yourself,
you are beginning to go beyond it.
Don't take the ego too seriously.
When you detect egoist behavior in yourself, smile.
At times you may even laugh...
Above all, know that the ego isn't personal.
It isn't who you are.
David R. Hawkins, M.D. Ph.D., author of "Power vs. Force"
Yes, smile. Comfort that scared little child with a reminder that you will always be safe. Your purpose here is to stretch, grow and continuously move into newer, bigger and better comfort zones. Tell it that what it fears isn't real. Put him in the back seat with a sippy cup and a blankie and you travel forward on your personal journey of self-awareness, abundance and peaceful joyful living.
"The intuitive mind is a sacred gift and the rational mind is a faithful servant. We have created a society that honors the servant and has forgotten the gift." - Albert Einstein
Valery is the Founder of the International Association for Inner Wizards. She teaches people how to tame their self-doubt and fear, empower their intuition, truth and inspiration to live a joyous and peaceful life. Everything you need to be, do and have is already within you. Your Inner Wizard is the best coach, guide, guru, teacher and shaman you could ever hope to have. Let your Inner Critic take a back seat, with a blankie and a sippy cup, as you deliberately place your Inner Wizard power in the driver seat as you drive towards your rich delicious life. I guarantee no wrong turns will be made on your life's journey when you are guided by your Inner Wizard. Get free mini-book "Discover Your Inner Wizard" today at http://www.InnerWizard.com.
The Ego: A Misguided Inner Critic
I spent several weeks envisioning a graphical image of the Inner Critic. I worked with a fabulous cartoonist, Gary Cooper of Cooptoons, to create a gnarly looking, yet lovable and fun creature. I wanted something that at first glance looked scary and at the second glance looked hug-able. The Inner Critic is really a frightened little child. And this frighten little child has the job of keeping you safe and happy. While it means well, this Inner Critic is woefully misguided. It thinks that what will keep you safe and happy is to keep you stuck, right where you are, in your current comfort zone. It knows that you may not like your current comfort zone but it's what the Inner Critic knows and so it feels safe. The Inner Critic will resist, throw a fit of drama, if you try to stretch, grow and move beyond your current comfort zone.
When you observe the ego in yourself,
you are beginning to go beyond it.
Don't take the ego too seriously.
When you detect egoist behavior in yourself, smile.
At times you may even laugh...
Above all, know that the ego isn't personal.
It isn't who you are.
David R. Hawkins, M.D. Ph.D., author of "Power vs. Force"
Yes, smile. Comfort that scared little child with a reminder that you will always be safe. Your purpose here is to stretch, grow and continuously move into newer, bigger and better comfort zones. Tell it that what it fears isn't real. Put him in the back seat with a sippy cup and a blankie and you travel forward on your personal journey of self-awareness, abundance and peaceful joyful living.
"The intuitive mind is a sacred gift and the rational mind is a faithful servant. We have created a society that honors the servant and has forgotten the gift." - Albert Einstein
Valery is the Founder of the International Association for Inner Wizards. She teaches people how to tame their self-doubt and fear, empower their intuition, truth and inspiration to live a joyous and peaceful life. Everything you need to be, do and have is already within you. Your Inner Wizard is the best coach, guide, guru, teacher and shaman you could ever hope to have. Let your Inner Critic take a back seat, with a blankie and a sippy cup, as you deliberately place your Inner Wizard power in the driver seat as you drive towards your rich delicious life. I guarantee no wrong turns will be made on your life's journey when you are guided by your Inner Wizard. Get free mini-book "Discover Your Inner Wizard" today at http://www.InnerWizard.com.
Thursday, February 5, 2009
EFT is Unconditional Love
Many people have discovered the Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) to relieve emotional blocks and stress. EFT was developed on the basic discovery that the cause of all negative emotions is a disruption in the body's energy system. Tapping with specific attention and intention to relieve an emotional block on the body's meridian points - acupressure instead of acupuncture - the body's energy system will realign and remove a disruption or block, thus altering emotional behavior patterns within the individual.
People beat the drum and beat the drum with their story. "I'm not fill-in-the-blank enough" to whatever, or "I did or felt some unwanted thing" and "that's why I can't be, do or have what I want in life" is the story many people tell themselves and others throughout their life. And they subconsciously work hard to make sure the story stays true. It's how they identify themselves. People may not like their story but it's what they know so it's safe and comfortable. The disrupted life is all they know even these same people long for some other way of being.
EFT has helped many people get out of tired old limiting and often painful comfort zones.
How does EFT work? Is it really about tapping with intention on the body's meridian points? Could be, yet that doesn't explain why many people find relief using EFT while missing every point along the meridian. Many people don't even tap, they just imagine themselves tapping and find relief. So, how does EFT really work?
EFT starts with a set-up statement while tapping on the fatty part of the side of the hand - the karate chop point. This statement has the following structure:
"Even though I have this (fear, pain, issue, conflict, unwanted thing), I deeply and completely love and accept myself."
Let me repeat the last part of that sentence, "I deeply and completely love and accept myself".
For many people this is the first time they've ever uttered, let alone thought, that they could deeply and completely love and accept themselves. All emotional healing is a process of profoundly loving and accepting oneself. An unconditional love of self.
Yes, people can and do behave badly. Mistakes are made. Yet no one gets out of bed in the morning and says "How can I cause problems for myself and others today?" No one deliberately self-sabotages or hurts others. Everyone is doing the best they can with the light, the emotional intelligence, they have to see. And some people have a few more batteries in that flashlight than others. Yet, everyone is doing the best they can.
The key to unconditional love of self and others is this understanding that even when woefully misguided you and everyone else is doing the best they can. Even the most horrible action was thought to be a good idea for the person committing it. Not much light in that flashlight!
Instead of beating the drum about your story of 'not enough' or 'can't because', beating yourself up, love and accept yourself as someone doing the best he or she can. Shine some light upon yourself. Give yourself permission to change your story and be, do or have enough so you can be, do and have whatever you long to be, do and have. Forgive and let go of your perceived limitations and mistakes. Embrace the gift in the lesson learned. Find evidence to the contrary of "I'm not enough".
Unconditional love is the freedom and release of fear, pain and all limitation. You are meant to be and express unconditional love. When you limit this expression you limit yourself. And the greatest energetic power is unconditional love. It is available to us at any moment we focus upon it. Unconditional love is the creative force of your unlimited possibility!
"One word frees us of all the weight and pain in life. That word is love." - Sophocles
Valery is the Founder of the International Association for Inner Wizards. Learn how to tame your Inner Critic, the voice of your self-doubt and fear, and empower your Inner Wizard, your intuition and inspiration, to effortlessly turn your dreams into reality. Everything you need to be, do and have is already within you. Your Inner Wizard is the best coach, guide, guru, teacher and shaman you could ever hope to have. Let your Inner Critic take a back seat, with a blankie and a sippy cup, as you deliberately place your Inner Wizard power in the driver seat as you drive towards your rich delicious life. I guarantee no wrong turns will be made on your life's journey when you are guided by your Inner Wizard. Get free mini-book "Discover Your Inner Wizard" today at http://www.InnerWizard.com.
People beat the drum and beat the drum with their story. "I'm not fill-in-the-blank enough" to whatever, or "I did or felt some unwanted thing" and "that's why I can't be, do or have what I want in life" is the story many people tell themselves and others throughout their life. And they subconsciously work hard to make sure the story stays true. It's how they identify themselves. People may not like their story but it's what they know so it's safe and comfortable. The disrupted life is all they know even these same people long for some other way of being.
EFT has helped many people get out of tired old limiting and often painful comfort zones.
How does EFT work? Is it really about tapping with intention on the body's meridian points? Could be, yet that doesn't explain why many people find relief using EFT while missing every point along the meridian. Many people don't even tap, they just imagine themselves tapping and find relief. So, how does EFT really work?
EFT starts with a set-up statement while tapping on the fatty part of the side of the hand - the karate chop point. This statement has the following structure:
"Even though I have this (fear, pain, issue, conflict, unwanted thing), I deeply and completely love and accept myself."
Let me repeat the last part of that sentence, "I deeply and completely love and accept myself".
For many people this is the first time they've ever uttered, let alone thought, that they could deeply and completely love and accept themselves. All emotional healing is a process of profoundly loving and accepting oneself. An unconditional love of self.
Yes, people can and do behave badly. Mistakes are made. Yet no one gets out of bed in the morning and says "How can I cause problems for myself and others today?" No one deliberately self-sabotages or hurts others. Everyone is doing the best they can with the light, the emotional intelligence, they have to see. And some people have a few more batteries in that flashlight than others. Yet, everyone is doing the best they can.
The key to unconditional love of self and others is this understanding that even when woefully misguided you and everyone else is doing the best they can. Even the most horrible action was thought to be a good idea for the person committing it. Not much light in that flashlight!
Instead of beating the drum about your story of 'not enough' or 'can't because', beating yourself up, love and accept yourself as someone doing the best he or she can. Shine some light upon yourself. Give yourself permission to change your story and be, do or have enough so you can be, do and have whatever you long to be, do and have. Forgive and let go of your perceived limitations and mistakes. Embrace the gift in the lesson learned. Find evidence to the contrary of "I'm not enough".
Unconditional love is the freedom and release of fear, pain and all limitation. You are meant to be and express unconditional love. When you limit this expression you limit yourself. And the greatest energetic power is unconditional love. It is available to us at any moment we focus upon it. Unconditional love is the creative force of your unlimited possibility!
"One word frees us of all the weight and pain in life. That word is love." - Sophocles
Valery is the Founder of the International Association for Inner Wizards. Learn how to tame your Inner Critic, the voice of your self-doubt and fear, and empower your Inner Wizard, your intuition and inspiration, to effortlessly turn your dreams into reality. Everything you need to be, do and have is already within you. Your Inner Wizard is the best coach, guide, guru, teacher and shaman you could ever hope to have. Let your Inner Critic take a back seat, with a blankie and a sippy cup, as you deliberately place your Inner Wizard power in the driver seat as you drive towards your rich delicious life. I guarantee no wrong turns will be made on your life's journey when you are guided by your Inner Wizard. Get free mini-book "Discover Your Inner Wizard" today at http://www.InnerWizard.com.
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
Inspiring Athletes: "Don't Make Me Cry, Roy"
I spent a delightful weekend reading Roy Firestone's book, "Don't Make Me Cry, Roy - Adventures in Interviewing". Roy is a known sportscaster famous for his poignant personal interviews with over 5,000 sports stars and other celebrities. You might have seen him as himself in the movie "Jerry Maguire" where he brings Cuba Gooding Jr.'s character to crocodile tears during a televised interview.
I am not a sports fan. I had no idea what teams were playing in the Superbowl. So, why was I reading Roy's book? Roy has the unprecedented ability to get into and reveal the mindset of his guest and deliver their stories in an honest and humorous tone. What makes these people champions and what makes them often crash and burn in the tabloids is fascinating to me. Roy's book delivers humorous personal anecdotes and touching emotional stories that are 'offered up from the heart, and from the best seat in the house'.
Roy also describes his own personal journey as a sports fan, world-class interviewer, performer and father as he turned his dreams into reality and was inspired by others along the way. Roy discovered that the life of an athlete and his own life paralleled in that it wasn't just about perspiration, it was about inspiration too. He was inspired by those who triumphed over enormous odds in their professional sports careers as well as their personal lives. He learned valuable lessons from those who seemingly had it all and threw it away with inflated egos, unsportsmanlike behavior and bad judgement. Perhaps the most profound stories were the ones where a fallen superstar picked himself up to win the next chapter in his life. Yes, some of our coveted sports giants went from knucklehead jerk status to hero and left a legacy in the inspiration they provided off the field.
Here are a few examples from the book:
Magic Johnson - Went from super basketball star to cast-out tagged with the stigma of A.I.D.S. and then beloved philanthropic entrepreneur. Magic said to Roy, "What A.I.D.S. taught me was to love your dreams more. The biggest thing I dreamed as a kid was I always wanted to be viewed as a businessman, someone who could see something and make it happen. So when I talk about rebuilding inner cities, and people told me there was no money and no money to do it, I said we had to do it, we need to put some pride in this community."
And he did it. He built theaters, franchised stores, restaurants and fitness centers. He built growth where there was none, created jobs where there was none and opened up possibilities for people who had none before. This is Magic's legacy. He continues to fulfill his wildest dreams by discovering the gift in what is viewed as a death sentence for many. Magic is the shining example that dreams can always come true if you believe - believe in your self.
Andre Agassi speaking to the crowd on his 2006 U.S. Open defeat:
"The scoreboard said I lost today but the scoreboard doesn't say what I have found. And over the last 21 years I have found loyalty. You pulled for me on the court and also in life. I've found inspiration. You have willed me to succeed even in my lowest moments. And I've found generosity. You have given me your shoulders to stand on to reach for my dreams - dreams I could never have reached without you. Over the last 21 years I have found you and I will take you, and the memory of you, with me for the rest of my life. Thank you."
This statement was from that once very public jerk of a trouble maker, a spoiled punk of a kid on and off the court. Tennis may have delivered a fortune to Agassi but the gift that mattered, that influenced his life more than anything else, was the lesson he learned about compassion. Since his 2006 defeat, Agassi's legacy has been his compassion and philanthropic endeavors for underprivileged children.
This is just a small glimpse into the treasure chest of inspiring and heart-wrenching stories told by Roy Firestone, the guy sitting front-row center to the lives, loves and losses of giants on and off the game. The real champions are the ones who scored biggest in life. I encourage you to pick up a copy today at Amazon.com.
Valery is the Founder of the International Association for Inner Wizards. Learn how to tame your Inner Critic, the voice of your self-doubt and fear, and empower your Inner Wizard, your intuition and inspiration, to effortlessly turn your dreams into reality. Everything you need to be, do and have is already within you. Your Inner Wizard is the best coach, guide, guru, teacher and shaman you could ever hope to have. Let your Inner Critic take a back seat, with a blankie and a sippy cup, as you deliberately place your Inner Wizard power in the driver seat as you drive towards your rich delicious life. I guarantee no wrong turns will be made on your life's journey when you are guided by your Inner Wizard. Get free mini-book "Discover Your Inner Wizard" today at http://www.InnerWizard.com.
I am not a sports fan. I had no idea what teams were playing in the Superbowl. So, why was I reading Roy's book? Roy has the unprecedented ability to get into and reveal the mindset of his guest and deliver their stories in an honest and humorous tone. What makes these people champions and what makes them often crash and burn in the tabloids is fascinating to me. Roy's book delivers humorous personal anecdotes and touching emotional stories that are 'offered up from the heart, and from the best seat in the house'.
Roy also describes his own personal journey as a sports fan, world-class interviewer, performer and father as he turned his dreams into reality and was inspired by others along the way. Roy discovered that the life of an athlete and his own life paralleled in that it wasn't just about perspiration, it was about inspiration too. He was inspired by those who triumphed over enormous odds in their professional sports careers as well as their personal lives. He learned valuable lessons from those who seemingly had it all and threw it away with inflated egos, unsportsmanlike behavior and bad judgement. Perhaps the most profound stories were the ones where a fallen superstar picked himself up to win the next chapter in his life. Yes, some of our coveted sports giants went from knucklehead jerk status to hero and left a legacy in the inspiration they provided off the field.
Here are a few examples from the book:
Magic Johnson - Went from super basketball star to cast-out tagged with the stigma of A.I.D.S. and then beloved philanthropic entrepreneur. Magic said to Roy, "What A.I.D.S. taught me was to love your dreams more. The biggest thing I dreamed as a kid was I always wanted to be viewed as a businessman, someone who could see something and make it happen. So when I talk about rebuilding inner cities, and people told me there was no money and no money to do it, I said we had to do it, we need to put some pride in this community."
And he did it. He built theaters, franchised stores, restaurants and fitness centers. He built growth where there was none, created jobs where there was none and opened up possibilities for people who had none before. This is Magic's legacy. He continues to fulfill his wildest dreams by discovering the gift in what is viewed as a death sentence for many. Magic is the shining example that dreams can always come true if you believe - believe in your self.
Andre Agassi speaking to the crowd on his 2006 U.S. Open defeat:
"The scoreboard said I lost today but the scoreboard doesn't say what I have found. And over the last 21 years I have found loyalty. You pulled for me on the court and also in life. I've found inspiration. You have willed me to succeed even in my lowest moments. And I've found generosity. You have given me your shoulders to stand on to reach for my dreams - dreams I could never have reached without you. Over the last 21 years I have found you and I will take you, and the memory of you, with me for the rest of my life. Thank you."
This statement was from that once very public jerk of a trouble maker, a spoiled punk of a kid on and off the court. Tennis may have delivered a fortune to Agassi but the gift that mattered, that influenced his life more than anything else, was the lesson he learned about compassion. Since his 2006 defeat, Agassi's legacy has been his compassion and philanthropic endeavors for underprivileged children.
This is just a small glimpse into the treasure chest of inspiring and heart-wrenching stories told by Roy Firestone, the guy sitting front-row center to the lives, loves and losses of giants on and off the game. The real champions are the ones who scored biggest in life. I encourage you to pick up a copy today at Amazon.com.
Valery is the Founder of the International Association for Inner Wizards. Learn how to tame your Inner Critic, the voice of your self-doubt and fear, and empower your Inner Wizard, your intuition and inspiration, to effortlessly turn your dreams into reality. Everything you need to be, do and have is already within you. Your Inner Wizard is the best coach, guide, guru, teacher and shaman you could ever hope to have. Let your Inner Critic take a back seat, with a blankie and a sippy cup, as you deliberately place your Inner Wizard power in the driver seat as you drive towards your rich delicious life. I guarantee no wrong turns will be made on your life's journey when you are guided by your Inner Wizard. Get free mini-book "Discover Your Inner Wizard" today at http://www.InnerWizard.com.
Inspiring Athletes: "Don't Make Me Cry, Roy"
I spent a delightful weekend reading Roy Firestone's book, "Don't Make Me Cry, Roy - Adventures in Interviewing". Roy is a known sportscaster famous for his poignant personal interviews with over 5,000 sports stars and other celebrities. You might have seen him as himself in the movie "Jerry Maguire" where he brings Cuba Gooding Jr.'s character to crocodile tears during a televised interview.
I am not a sports fan. I had no idea what teams were playing in the Superbowl. So, why was I reading Roy's book? Roy has the unprecedented ability to get into and reveal the mindset of his guest and deliver their stories in an honest and humorous tone. What makes these people champions and what makes them often crash and burn in the tabloids is fascinating to me. Roy's book delivers humorous personal anecdotes and touching emotional stories that are 'offered up from the heart, and from the best seat in the house'.
Roy also describes his own personal journey as a sports fan, world-class interviewer, performer and father as he turned his dreams into reality and was inspired by others along the way. Roy discovered that the life of an athlete and his own life paralleled in that it wasn't just about perspiration, it was about inspiration too. He was inspired by those who triumphed over enormous odds in their professional sports careers as well as their personal lives. He learned valuable lessons from those who seemingly had it all and threw it away with inflated egos, unsportsmanlike behavior and bad judgement. Perhaps the most profound stories were the ones where a fallen superstar picked himself up to win the next chapter in his life. Yes, some of our coveted sports giants went from knucklehead jerk status to hero and left a legacy in the inspiration they provided off the field.
Here are a few examples from the book:
Magic Johnson - Went from super basketball star to cast-out tagged with the stigma of A.I.D.S. and then beloved philanthropic entrepreneur. Magic said to Roy, "What A.I.D.S. taught me was to love your dreams more. The biggest thing I dreamed as a kid was I always wanted to be viewed as a businessman, someone who could see something and make it happen. So when I talk about rebuilding inner cities, and people told me there was no money and no money to do it, I said we had to do it, we need to put some pride in this community."
And he did it. He built theaters, franchised stores, restaurants and fitness centers. He built growth where there was none, created jobs where there was none and opened up possibilities for people who had none before. This is Magic's legacy. He continues to fulfill his wildest dreams by discovering the gift in what is viewed as a death sentence for many. Magic is the shining example that dreams can always come true if you believe - believe in your self.
Andre Agassi speaking to the crowd on his 2006 U.S. Open defeat:
"The scoreboard said I lost today but the scoreboard doesn't say what I have found. And over the last 21 years I have found loyalty. You pulled for me on the court and also in life. I've found inspiration. You have willed me to succeed even in my lowest moments. And I've found generosity. You have given me your shoulders to stand on to reach for my dreams - dreams I could never have reached without you. Over the last 21 years I have found you and I will take you, and the memory of you, with me for the rest of my life. Thank you."
This statement was from that once very public jerk of a trouble maker, a spoiled punk of a kid on and off the court. Tennis may have delivered a fortune to Agassi but the gift that mattered, that influenced his life more than anything else, was the lesson he learned about compassion. Since his 2006 defeat, Agassi's legacy has been his compassion and philanthropic endeavors for underprivileged children.
This is just a small glimpse into the treasure chest of inspiring and heart-wrenching stories told by Roy Firestone, the guy sitting front-row center to the lives, loves and losses of giants on and off the game. The real champions are the ones who scored biggest in life. I encourage you to pick up a copy today at Amazon.com.
"I believe we have two lives. The life we learn with and the live we live after that." - Glenn Close in the movie "The Natural"
Valery is the Founder of the International Association for Inner Wizards. Learn how to tame your Inner Critic, the voice of your self-doubt and fear, and empower your Inner Wizard, your intuition and inspiration, to effortlessly turn your dreams into reality. Everything you need to be, do and have is already within you. Your Inner Wizard is the best coach, guide, guru, teacher and shaman you could ever hope to have. Let your Inner Critic take a back seat, with a blankie and a sippy cup, as you deliberately place your Inner Wizard power in the driver seat as you drive towards your rich delicious life. I guarantee no wrong turns will be made on your life's journey when you are guided by your Inner Wizard. Get free mini-book "Discover Your Inner Wizard" today at http://www.InnerWizard.com.
I am not a sports fan. I had no idea what teams were playing in the Superbowl. So, why was I reading Roy's book? Roy has the unprecedented ability to get into and reveal the mindset of his guest and deliver their stories in an honest and humorous tone. What makes these people champions and what makes them often crash and burn in the tabloids is fascinating to me. Roy's book delivers humorous personal anecdotes and touching emotional stories that are 'offered up from the heart, and from the best seat in the house'.
Roy also describes his own personal journey as a sports fan, world-class interviewer, performer and father as he turned his dreams into reality and was inspired by others along the way. Roy discovered that the life of an athlete and his own life paralleled in that it wasn't just about perspiration, it was about inspiration too. He was inspired by those who triumphed over enormous odds in their professional sports careers as well as their personal lives. He learned valuable lessons from those who seemingly had it all and threw it away with inflated egos, unsportsmanlike behavior and bad judgement. Perhaps the most profound stories were the ones where a fallen superstar picked himself up to win the next chapter in his life. Yes, some of our coveted sports giants went from knucklehead jerk status to hero and left a legacy in the inspiration they provided off the field.
Here are a few examples from the book:
Magic Johnson - Went from super basketball star to cast-out tagged with the stigma of A.I.D.S. and then beloved philanthropic entrepreneur. Magic said to Roy, "What A.I.D.S. taught me was to love your dreams more. The biggest thing I dreamed as a kid was I always wanted to be viewed as a businessman, someone who could see something and make it happen. So when I talk about rebuilding inner cities, and people told me there was no money and no money to do it, I said we had to do it, we need to put some pride in this community."
And he did it. He built theaters, franchised stores, restaurants and fitness centers. He built growth where there was none, created jobs where there was none and opened up possibilities for people who had none before. This is Magic's legacy. He continues to fulfill his wildest dreams by discovering the gift in what is viewed as a death sentence for many. Magic is the shining example that dreams can always come true if you believe - believe in your self.
Andre Agassi speaking to the crowd on his 2006 U.S. Open defeat:
"The scoreboard said I lost today but the scoreboard doesn't say what I have found. And over the last 21 years I have found loyalty. You pulled for me on the court and also in life. I've found inspiration. You have willed me to succeed even in my lowest moments. And I've found generosity. You have given me your shoulders to stand on to reach for my dreams - dreams I could never have reached without you. Over the last 21 years I have found you and I will take you, and the memory of you, with me for the rest of my life. Thank you."
This statement was from that once very public jerk of a trouble maker, a spoiled punk of a kid on and off the court. Tennis may have delivered a fortune to Agassi but the gift that mattered, that influenced his life more than anything else, was the lesson he learned about compassion. Since his 2006 defeat, Agassi's legacy has been his compassion and philanthropic endeavors for underprivileged children.
This is just a small glimpse into the treasure chest of inspiring and heart-wrenching stories told by Roy Firestone, the guy sitting front-row center to the lives, loves and losses of giants on and off the game. The real champions are the ones who scored biggest in life. I encourage you to pick up a copy today at Amazon.com.
"I believe we have two lives. The life we learn with and the live we live after that." - Glenn Close in the movie "The Natural"
Valery is the Founder of the International Association for Inner Wizards. Learn how to tame your Inner Critic, the voice of your self-doubt and fear, and empower your Inner Wizard, your intuition and inspiration, to effortlessly turn your dreams into reality. Everything you need to be, do and have is already within you. Your Inner Wizard is the best coach, guide, guru, teacher and shaman you could ever hope to have. Let your Inner Critic take a back seat, with a blankie and a sippy cup, as you deliberately place your Inner Wizard power in the driver seat as you drive towards your rich delicious life. I guarantee no wrong turns will be made on your life's journey when you are guided by your Inner Wizard. Get free mini-book "Discover Your Inner Wizard" today at http://www.InnerWizard.com.
Thursday, January 29, 2009
Stuck or Exhausted? Stop Dragging The Reluctant
Are you:
- stuck in a rut?
- often tired even though you get enough sleep?
- procrastinating even the easy things?
- finding excuses and reasons why you can't be, do or have what you want in life?
If you answered yes to any of those questions then you are spending your days dragging The Reluctant along. And that's exhausting! Sometimes the reluctant weighs so heavy upon you that you can't move forward at all, so you're stuck, right where you are, unable to achieve much of anything.
What is The Reluctant, you ask?
The reluctant is that Inner Critic within you. It is the voice of self-doubt and fear. It is the part of you that wants to hold you back and keep you safe. Safe is what you know, where you already are.
You created this Inner Critic to help you cope, help you navigate, in your immediate environment when you were a little child. It served as your protector and did a pretty good job of it too. Kept you out of trouble by telling you to follow certain rules of survival. Rules such as 'you're bad if you make mistakes' or 'children should be seen and not heard'. The problem is you're no longer in that environment. And, although your Inner Critic means well, he is woefully misguided.
For example, you may have spilled paint all over the floor and a parent said, in a moment of frustration, "You're a bad boy! Look what you did!" So, the Inner Critic stops you from trying new things because you don't want to make any mistakes and be a bad person. "Children should be seen and not heard" becomes "I have nothing of importance to say" that can then become "I'm stupid". You don't think you're smart enough to take on bigger challenges.
As you grew older, this Inner Critic became a constant background hum that you forgot was there. Yet you continue, unconsciously, to obey its set of rules for you. This toxic belief system about what will keep you safe and out of trouble is guiding the choices you make, what actions to take, or not to take. These Inner Critic rule create the reluctance that drags you down and keeps you from moving forward.
Some people will say that you have to work toward eliminating the limiting beliefs this reluctant Inner Critic holds over you. I disagree. The Inner Critic is a part of you like your left foot is a part of you. You do, however, want to take away its power over you. Notice when you are finding excuses and reasons for "I can't". Those excuses and reasons are the misguided rules. Look for evidence of the opposite. Remember when you learned a lot from a mistake so the mistake benefited you in some may. Remember when people listened earnestly to what you had to say. This evidence is all around you. You just haven't been paying attention because you've been too busy dragging The Reluctant.
Ask yourself:
- What if I could?
- How would my life change?
- What could I be, do or have that I cannot now?
- How would that feel?
See yourself as you would be if you let go of your reluctance, disarmed your Inner Critic, and took one step forward. That one step forward will help you build energy and the momentum to get out of your stuck place. Life flows effortlessly when you leave The Reluctant behind.
"It is not because things are difficult that we do not dare, it is because we do not dare that they are difficult." ~ Seneca
Valery is the Founder of the International Association for Inner Wizards. Learn how to tame your Inner Critic, the voice of your self-doubt and fear, and empower your Inner Wizard, your intuition and inspiration, to effortlessly turn your dreams into reality. Everything you need to be, do and have is already within you. Your Inner Wizard is the best coach, guide, guru, teacher and shaman you could ever hope to have. Let your Inner Critic take a back seat, with a blankie and a sippy cup, as you deliberately place your Inner Wizard power in the driver seat as you drive towards your rich delicious life. I guarantee no wrong turns will be made on your life's journey when you are guided by your Inner Wizard. Get free mini-book "Discover Your Inner Wizard" today at http://www.InnerWizard.com.
- stuck in a rut?
- often tired even though you get enough sleep?
- procrastinating even the easy things?
- finding excuses and reasons why you can't be, do or have what you want in life?
If you answered yes to any of those questions then you are spending your days dragging The Reluctant along. And that's exhausting! Sometimes the reluctant weighs so heavy upon you that you can't move forward at all, so you're stuck, right where you are, unable to achieve much of anything.
What is The Reluctant, you ask?
The reluctant is that Inner Critic within you. It is the voice of self-doubt and fear. It is the part of you that wants to hold you back and keep you safe. Safe is what you know, where you already are.
You created this Inner Critic to help you cope, help you navigate, in your immediate environment when you were a little child. It served as your protector and did a pretty good job of it too. Kept you out of trouble by telling you to follow certain rules of survival. Rules such as 'you're bad if you make mistakes' or 'children should be seen and not heard'. The problem is you're no longer in that environment. And, although your Inner Critic means well, he is woefully misguided.
For example, you may have spilled paint all over the floor and a parent said, in a moment of frustration, "You're a bad boy! Look what you did!" So, the Inner Critic stops you from trying new things because you don't want to make any mistakes and be a bad person. "Children should be seen and not heard" becomes "I have nothing of importance to say" that can then become "I'm stupid". You don't think you're smart enough to take on bigger challenges.
As you grew older, this Inner Critic became a constant background hum that you forgot was there. Yet you continue, unconsciously, to obey its set of rules for you. This toxic belief system about what will keep you safe and out of trouble is guiding the choices you make, what actions to take, or not to take. These Inner Critic rule create the reluctance that drags you down and keeps you from moving forward.
Some people will say that you have to work toward eliminating the limiting beliefs this reluctant Inner Critic holds over you. I disagree. The Inner Critic is a part of you like your left foot is a part of you. You do, however, want to take away its power over you. Notice when you are finding excuses and reasons for "I can't". Those excuses and reasons are the misguided rules. Look for evidence of the opposite. Remember when you learned a lot from a mistake so the mistake benefited you in some may. Remember when people listened earnestly to what you had to say. This evidence is all around you. You just haven't been paying attention because you've been too busy dragging The Reluctant.
Ask yourself:
- What if I could?
- How would my life change?
- What could I be, do or have that I cannot now?
- How would that feel?
See yourself as you would be if you let go of your reluctance, disarmed your Inner Critic, and took one step forward. That one step forward will help you build energy and the momentum to get out of your stuck place. Life flows effortlessly when you leave The Reluctant behind.
"It is not because things are difficult that we do not dare, it is because we do not dare that they are difficult." ~ Seneca
Valery is the Founder of the International Association for Inner Wizards. Learn how to tame your Inner Critic, the voice of your self-doubt and fear, and empower your Inner Wizard, your intuition and inspiration, to effortlessly turn your dreams into reality. Everything you need to be, do and have is already within you. Your Inner Wizard is the best coach, guide, guru, teacher and shaman you could ever hope to have. Let your Inner Critic take a back seat, with a blankie and a sippy cup, as you deliberately place your Inner Wizard power in the driver seat as you drive towards your rich delicious life. I guarantee no wrong turns will be made on your life's journey when you are guided by your Inner Wizard. Get free mini-book "Discover Your Inner Wizard" today at http://www.InnerWizard.com.
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
Self-Awarness Journey? Your Mirrors Have Blind Spots
The vehicle you use to travel on your road to self-awareness and abundance is self-examination. The process of self-examination is a journey of twists and turns, straightaways with frequent glimpses in your side and rearview mirrors. As you know from your driving experiences, mirrors have blind spots and some mirrors will even warn you that some objects may be closer than they appear.
The same is true with self-examination. There are blind spots and some experiences in your self-examination are closer to the experiences you are having today than they appear. Road blocks to self-examination and effective life transformation stay hidden in these blind spots. If you are driving your car and know that you have a blind spot you will ask your passenger, if you have one, to take a look from their vantage point to see if there's anything in the way of you being able to get to your destination safely. Or, your passenger will see the roadblock or oncoming car and warn you so you can take corrective measures. Your passenger can see what is reflected in your mirror from her vantage position when you can't. If you have no passenger, no other vantage point, you risk being blindsided with an unwanted, possibly damaging, experience.
The road to self-awareness is littered with roadblocks and debris that must be overcome or cleaned-up in order to get to your desired destination - the fulfillment of what you long for. Are you traveling alone on your personal journey? Reading articles and self-help books by yourself or listening to expert speakers will certainly serve as an excellent tool to tell you how to drive a car. Yet they don't know you're destination, your personal passions and dreams, what street you started your journey on or what roadblocks are on the roads you travel on in this very individual journey. No two journeys are the same. Articles, books and lectures cannot map your route, point out your individual blind spots. They cannot relied upon to guide you personally as a passenger on your unique road. These things cannot see what's in your mirror and let you know what is in your way of moving forward if you are unable to see what is blocking you.
The fact that you've pulled your car out of the garage and have begun the journey to self-awareness indicates that you've placed your Inner Critic (self-doubt and fear) in the back seat. That's a terrific start! However, are you allowing him to be a back-seat driver? Is he still yelling out directions and routes you 'should' take? If so, he might as well be driving. And the trouble with his driving abilities is that he does not know how to look forward to see what's down the road let alone be aware of any blind spots. Your Inner Critic thinks that to get anywhere you have to always have your sights on the rearview mirror. And you wonder why the same unwanted experiences keep happening over and over again. Your Inner Critic is trying to get to where you want to go by following what he sees in your rearview mirror.
There is another passenger you could travel with you who clearly sees the road ahead and is able to view the mirrors from every vantage point. It is your Inner Wizard. The journey to connecting with and tapping into the magical power of your Inner Wizard is also subject to blind spots. Having a trusted person there with you to guide you from time-to-time to point out what they see in your mirrors, give you a different perspective, will prevent you from getting lost or side-tracked along the way. Once you're able to completely hear, trust and rely upon your Inner Wizard he will always be your front-seat passenger on any journey you take. You will always have someone to watch out for your blind spots. Just tell your Inner Wizard what your destination is and he will immediately get to work creating a map that will get you from Point A to Point B effortlessly. He will readily reveal what is lurking in your blind spots as you travel safely by. Oh, and he's quite a good conversationalist so you'll enjoy his company along the way.
Happy journeys to you!
ˆTame your Inner Critic and Empower your Inner Wizard. Find out how at http://www.InnerWizard.com. "Turn Your Dreams Into Reality" Get free mini-booklet "Discover Your Inner Wizard" today!
The same is true with self-examination. There are blind spots and some experiences in your self-examination are closer to the experiences you are having today than they appear. Road blocks to self-examination and effective life transformation stay hidden in these blind spots. If you are driving your car and know that you have a blind spot you will ask your passenger, if you have one, to take a look from their vantage point to see if there's anything in the way of you being able to get to your destination safely. Or, your passenger will see the roadblock or oncoming car and warn you so you can take corrective measures. Your passenger can see what is reflected in your mirror from her vantage position when you can't. If you have no passenger, no other vantage point, you risk being blindsided with an unwanted, possibly damaging, experience.
The road to self-awareness is littered with roadblocks and debris that must be overcome or cleaned-up in order to get to your desired destination - the fulfillment of what you long for. Are you traveling alone on your personal journey? Reading articles and self-help books by yourself or listening to expert speakers will certainly serve as an excellent tool to tell you how to drive a car. Yet they don't know you're destination, your personal passions and dreams, what street you started your journey on or what roadblocks are on the roads you travel on in this very individual journey. No two journeys are the same. Articles, books and lectures cannot map your route, point out your individual blind spots. They cannot relied upon to guide you personally as a passenger on your unique road. These things cannot see what's in your mirror and let you know what is in your way of moving forward if you are unable to see what is blocking you.
The fact that you've pulled your car out of the garage and have begun the journey to self-awareness indicates that you've placed your Inner Critic (self-doubt and fear) in the back seat. That's a terrific start! However, are you allowing him to be a back-seat driver? Is he still yelling out directions and routes you 'should' take? If so, he might as well be driving. And the trouble with his driving abilities is that he does not know how to look forward to see what's down the road let alone be aware of any blind spots. Your Inner Critic thinks that to get anywhere you have to always have your sights on the rearview mirror. And you wonder why the same unwanted experiences keep happening over and over again. Your Inner Critic is trying to get to where you want to go by following what he sees in your rearview mirror.
There is another passenger you could travel with you who clearly sees the road ahead and is able to view the mirrors from every vantage point. It is your Inner Wizard. The journey to connecting with and tapping into the magical power of your Inner Wizard is also subject to blind spots. Having a trusted person there with you to guide you from time-to-time to point out what they see in your mirrors, give you a different perspective, will prevent you from getting lost or side-tracked along the way. Once you're able to completely hear, trust and rely upon your Inner Wizard he will always be your front-seat passenger on any journey you take. You will always have someone to watch out for your blind spots. Just tell your Inner Wizard what your destination is and he will immediately get to work creating a map that will get you from Point A to Point B effortlessly. He will readily reveal what is lurking in your blind spots as you travel safely by. Oh, and he's quite a good conversationalist so you'll enjoy his company along the way.
Happy journeys to you!
ˆTame your Inner Critic and Empower your Inner Wizard. Find out how at http://www.InnerWizard.com. "Turn Your Dreams Into Reality" Get free mini-booklet "Discover Your Inner Wizard" today!
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
Empowering Advice from a Dad: "Grow Up, Move Out"
I often ask successful people what was the best piece of advice they ever got from a parent. What words of wisdom carried them forward as they achieved their personal and professional goals? Responses such as "Don't take anything for granted", "You have to work hard and struggle for success" and "It takes money to make money" are among the most common. I posed this same question to Wendy, a woman I met at a luncheon yesterday. Her quick response was "Grow up. Move out." That was her Dad's mantra to her ever since she was a very young child.
Wendy had a good, loving relationship with her father. He is no longer with us yet his sage word of advice echo in Wendy's conscious every day. The wisdom has changed a bit over the years to 'Grow up. Move on." as Wendy is now a very successful financial planner and the Mother to two beautiful children. "Grow Up. Move out." encouraged Wendy to take full responsibility for her life. She allowed her inner child to grow up without fear and self-doubt while maintaining a playfully creative approach to life's challenges and opportunities. Wendy never empowered her Inner Critic, the part of her that has the ability to hold her back. She always relied on her Inner Wizard, that strong powerful voice within her that is pure intuition and the birthplace of inspiration to guide her. Whenever choices had to be made, especially difficult ones, Wendy remembered her Dad's advice, "Grow Up. Move Out".
And Wendy grew up and moved out fast! She was a respected high school graduate at age 15 and graduated college with honors at 18. She married a few years later and pursued a career in financial planning. Her husband was diagnosed with cancer when she was pregnant with their second child. Her husband did not survive long after the birth. "Grow Up. Move On." the winds of change echoed. So empowered, Wendy navigated the troubled waters of a young widowed mother building a new life for herself and her children. There were many many challenges to overcome. How would the children be cared for? How can she continue to build a career? How do you pick up the piece of a life shattered by such a tragedy? "Grow Up. Move On." Take full responsibility for what you want to experience moving forward.
People sometimes fall-back into old childish patterns of behavior when triggered with a devastating experience. There is a tendency to crawl back to a place where you feel safe, feel protected, and can hide. This desire to grab for any internal comfort that you can find often empowers the Inner Critic, the voice of self-doubt and fear. This is the voice that protected you, helped you cope, in your environment when you were little. You are no longer a child and cannot move on if you are frozen in fear or doubt your abilities or what is possible for you.
Wendy moved on and formed a company with her Father to help others build financial wealth and security. It wasn't long before her father was also diagnosed with cancer. He died within a few months. "Grow up. Move on". Wendy continued to grow from this experience and moved on the become an advocate to empower widowed women to protect and enrich their financial future. Her words of advice for them is "Grow up. Move on." Wendy now teaches others who face the similar tragedies and challenges how to put one foot in front of the other, how to "Grow UP. Move On."
Wendy tells her story with a broad smile on her face. To many, it is a very tragic tale. To Wendy she has lived a blessed life. She continues to find joy and inspiration in her daily life. Each morning presents another opportunity to continue to grow and move beyond her current comfort zones. "Grow Up. Move Out." is the lifelong gift from her Dad that propels Wendy forward as she turns her dreams into reality.
Get free eBook: "Discover Your Inner Wizard" at http://www.InnerWizard.com
Wendy had a good, loving relationship with her father. He is no longer with us yet his sage word of advice echo in Wendy's conscious every day. The wisdom has changed a bit over the years to 'Grow up. Move on." as Wendy is now a very successful financial planner and the Mother to two beautiful children. "Grow Up. Move out." encouraged Wendy to take full responsibility for her life. She allowed her inner child to grow up without fear and self-doubt while maintaining a playfully creative approach to life's challenges and opportunities. Wendy never empowered her Inner Critic, the part of her that has the ability to hold her back. She always relied on her Inner Wizard, that strong powerful voice within her that is pure intuition and the birthplace of inspiration to guide her. Whenever choices had to be made, especially difficult ones, Wendy remembered her Dad's advice, "Grow Up. Move Out".
And Wendy grew up and moved out fast! She was a respected high school graduate at age 15 and graduated college with honors at 18. She married a few years later and pursued a career in financial planning. Her husband was diagnosed with cancer when she was pregnant with their second child. Her husband did not survive long after the birth. "Grow Up. Move On." the winds of change echoed. So empowered, Wendy navigated the troubled waters of a young widowed mother building a new life for herself and her children. There were many many challenges to overcome. How would the children be cared for? How can she continue to build a career? How do you pick up the piece of a life shattered by such a tragedy? "Grow Up. Move On." Take full responsibility for what you want to experience moving forward.
People sometimes fall-back into old childish patterns of behavior when triggered with a devastating experience. There is a tendency to crawl back to a place where you feel safe, feel protected, and can hide. This desire to grab for any internal comfort that you can find often empowers the Inner Critic, the voice of self-doubt and fear. This is the voice that protected you, helped you cope, in your environment when you were little. You are no longer a child and cannot move on if you are frozen in fear or doubt your abilities or what is possible for you.
Wendy moved on and formed a company with her Father to help others build financial wealth and security. It wasn't long before her father was also diagnosed with cancer. He died within a few months. "Grow up. Move on". Wendy continued to grow from this experience and moved on the become an advocate to empower widowed women to protect and enrich their financial future. Her words of advice for them is "Grow up. Move on." Wendy now teaches others who face the similar tragedies and challenges how to put one foot in front of the other, how to "Grow UP. Move On."
Wendy tells her story with a broad smile on her face. To many, it is a very tragic tale. To Wendy she has lived a blessed life. She continues to find joy and inspiration in her daily life. Each morning presents another opportunity to continue to grow and move beyond her current comfort zones. "Grow Up. Move Out." is the lifelong gift from her Dad that propels Wendy forward as she turns her dreams into reality.
Get free eBook: "Discover Your Inner Wizard" at http://www.InnerWizard.com
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
Posts
